No apostrophes? It’s preposterous
One of my favorite bucolic grammar tales is from a couple of years back. Over in England, the Mid Devon District Council created a punctuation firestorm when members proposed banning apostrophes from new street signs. So, for example, “King’s Crescent” would be “Kings Crescent.”
The council members said their goal was to reduce “confusion over street names.” The much older streets with apostrophes, such as “Blundell’s Avenue” and “St. George’s Well,” were named ages ago, they said. They’re old school.
Apoplexy ensued over the attack on this tool of basic punctuation. Among the miffed was proofreader Mary de Vere Taylor from Ashburton. She told the BBC that the action would be a step back. “Some may say I should get a life and get out more, but if I got out more and saw place names with no apostrophes where there should be, I shudder to think how I’d react,” she said.
Others demanded to speak to these people who may be confused at encountering apostrophes. The council declined to provide any names or examples.
If the council had allies, they were apparently silent.
What’s the difference with an apostrophe? “Baker’s View” in Devon is the view that a Sir Samuel White Baker had. “Bakers View” is a scene for those who bake.
The council heard criticism from around the kingdom and beyond. A spokesman for the Department for Communities and Local Government said, “Whilst this is ultimately a matter for the local council, ministers’ view is that England’s apostrophe should be cherished.”
(I love that “whilst” usage!) My sentiments exactly. Our story has a happy ending. The council ordered its staff to find a plan for road signs that preserved the apostrophes. “We made absolutely clear we wouldn’t accept any policy that does away with apostrophes or indeed any other punctuation marks,” Peter Hare-Scott (note the hyphen), the council’s leader, said.
“As a public body, we have a duty to promote good English.”
My punctuation hero, John Richards, who founded the Apostrophe Protection Society, was pleased with the council’s about-face.
“I’m very glad that they had second thoughts,” he said. “Once an official body starts saying, ‘Don’t do the apostrophes,’ it carries a lot of weight.”
I have never visited Devon, but I am a fan of Devon clotted cream. This is a thick cream formed when milk is heated, and the cream forms clots. Devon cream is essential for enjoying scones and jam with one’s tea. Probably a better name than “clotted cream’’ would help its marketing.
But all is not well. In researching the follow-up to this story, I learned that evil lurks. A website called KillTheApostrophe.com exists. I will not go there.
Sources: BBC, The Guardian, The Los Angeles Times