Turn lanes on bridge? By D-Day

Dear Mahatma: Read your column. While happy for the opening of the Broadway Bridge and the dedication, a question. The furthermost left lane on the north side, as well as the right turn lane onto the bridge on the north side remain closed. Any word on when they might open? — Grateful but Impatient

Dear Grateful: All ramps and turn lanes will be open by June 4, which is two days before the 73rd anniversary of D-Day. This has nothing to do with the Broadway Bridge, but the thought popped into our head.

There’s always more to be said, and was by Danny Straessle, a spokesman for the Arkansas Highway and Transportation Department.

Crews this week have begun widening West Broadway to make accommodations for the two left-turn lanes off the north end of the bridge heading west. When this widening is done, the furthermost left-turn lane will open. So too with the dedicated rightturn lane onto the bridge for eastbound traffic on West Broadway.

May we be picky? Thanks. That should be “farthermost,” rather than “furthermost,” we think, because farther is for distance and further is for, um, other purposes.

Furthermore, we will shut up.

Dear Luminary of the Lanes: Your question about changing lanes prompted me to write. The problem with drivers is that many seem to have a sense of entitlement, especially young drivers. My father drove a Little Rock city bus for 37 years. He taught me to drive defensively, to stay alert, and pay attention to what is behind as well as in front. He said having the right of way isn’t much of a consolation if my car is being towed and I’m in an ambulance. — Old Jane

Dear Jane: You claim to be old, but the wisdom you convey is timeless. You write in reference to a question last week from a driver who said he often signals to change lanes on a multilane highway, and a driver in that lane will speed up and effectively deny the lane change.

What to do? Our answer was to change lanes only when safe. Let the inconsiderate pass by, then change lanes.

May we defend young people? Some guy once said young people have bad manners. They have contempt for authority. They are disrespectful to elders.

Yeah, Socrates, tell it like it is, baby.

Astute readers may say, no, it was Aristotle. Either way, it’s all Greek to us.

Dear Mahatma: My boss drove with me recently on my route. We were driving through the Bobby Hopper Tunnel when he said I should honk my horn. I never heard this before. Neither have I heard any honking while driving through a tunnel. I wasn’t sure if my boss was kidding. What do you say? — Safe Driver

Dear Safe: We say your boss was pulling your leg. We say your boss believes in this myth. We say your boss is misinformed.

We are compelled to add, though, that your boss is a fine fellow who recognizes your qualities and should authorize a raise for you.

Vanity plate seen on a vividly blue pickup: BYANOSE.