Arkansas Democrat-Gazette

Otus the Head Cat

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Yellville pig drop? When pigs fly.

Dear Otus,

I read in the paper that PETA will be trying once again to halt the annual Yellville turkey drop. It’s a great 50-year tradition and I hope they aren’t successful.

What about the rumors that PETA is also trying to stop the wonderful pig races at the Arkansas State Fair? That’s the main reason we go to Little Rock each fall.

— Sean Schweinere­nnen,

Flippin Dear Sean,

It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you and to thank you for the opportunit­y to sort out all this offal.

Indeed, PETA is on the warpath once again. Their mission is to protect innocent critters that can’t protect themselves, including turkeys and pigs.

But it’s also incumbent upon me to point out the difference between hurling turkeys out of a low-flying airplane and watching pampered piglets run around a track at the state fair: Pigs don’t fly.

In the first case, the legendary (or infamous) “Phantom Pilot” of Yellville has indicated on his Facebook page (yes, he has a Facebook page) that he will fly once again this year.

Yellville’s 72nd Turkey Trot festival kicked off Friday and concludes at 10 p.m. today. This column went to press before the festival began, so I can’t report if any turkeys dropped Friday. The festival doesn’t sponsor the drop, so there is nothing on today’s official schedule, which includes the Possum Holler Fiddlers and (my favorite) Malia’s Polynesian Ohana Dance Group.

One would assume that if The Phantom Pilot plans to drop, it’ll be this afternoon, perhaps after the performanc­e by the Buffalo River Cloggers.

As it turns out, The Phantom Pilot isn’t so incognito anymore. An Oct. 5 article in this very newspaper reported, “Dana Woods, a Mountain View pharmacist and alderman, admitted last year that he has been The Phantom Pilot for about 15 years. Newspaper photograph­s in 2015 revealed the identifica­tion number of Woods’ singleengi­ne 1959 Cessna 182B. He flew again as The Phantom Pilot last year.”

According to the Federal Aviation Administra­tion, it’s legal to drop objects from airplanes as long as they don’t damage people or property on the ground.

Being birds, most of the turkeys simply glide to a landing where they are gobbled up by the crowd and, presumably, end up on the dinner table. Last year, about a dozen turkeys were dropped from Woods’ plane, and (reportedly) two of them lacking basic avian skills died on impact. That’s what has PETA stirred up.

Turkey dropping may be legal, but is it ethical? Does it cast a shadow over, say, the far more classy Turkey Trot events such as the Miss Drumsticks pageant, in which the winners are chosen solely for their shapely gams while their faces and upper torsos are kept hidden?

At least it’s not a Miss Turkey Breast pageant.

Meanwhile, expect PETA pig racing protesters at the Arkansas State Fair, which began Thursday and runs through Oct. 22. Unlike the wild turkeys in Yellville, the racing piglets have been bred to the track. It’s in their DNA. Like the greyhounds in West Memphis, it’s what they live for.

Like gladiators of old, the piglets are pampered beyond their wildest dreams and live a life of luxury and fame, glory and adulation. That lasts about two months after weaning until they’re too fat.

The sport of pig racing was first developed in Australia in 1840 as an adjunct to the Royal Adelaide Swine Show, the oldest and most prestigiou­s in the world. Racing became popular in the United States in the Midwest during the Depression.

In the late 1980s, the sport exploded when cable TV entreprene­ur “Rowdy” Ronnie Rambeaux of Tonganoxie, Kan., organized the first profession­al pig-racing circuit, PORK — Pigs Organized to Race in Kansas.

Rambeaux is credited with being the “Godfather of Pig Racing.” He establishe­d the now-familiar format of profession­al pig callers, racing silks for the piglets, audience participat­ion and local and national sponsors.

Famous racers over the years have included Hogzilla the Hulk, Pigasus, Arnold the Ziffle, Napoleon, Porko Rosso, Piggley Wiggily, and the piglets of The New Pig Order — Spoink, Grumpig, Swinub, Piloswine and Manmoo. All were winners of the NASBAR (National Associatio­n of Swine Breeders and Racers) championsh­ips and put out to stud.

Until next time, Kalaka reminds you that after their short racing careers are over, most piglets become the other white meat — everything from bacon and sausage to ham and chitterlin­gs.

 ??  ?? Eventual winner Sue Wee rounds the first turn at last year’s Arkansas State Fair pig races. Sue won 23 races in her short career.
Eventual winner Sue Wee rounds the first turn at last year’s Arkansas State Fair pig races. Sue won 23 races in her short career.
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