FERRIS BUELLER’S FANTASTIC FLAWS

The movie experts at CinemaSins give Ferris an F in geography and time management.

Was anyone paying attention in geography class? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller? Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is one of the most indelible high school movies of all time, but even Ferris—with all his effortless cool and smarts—could never have gotten around the Windy City in the movie’s time frame.

The Flaw: What Ferris did and where he went! Geography, people!

Chicago is a big city. Like, really, really big. The makers obviously looked at what they wanted Ferris to do and decided to leave geographic and timeline reality in the dust as Ferris and friends drove away in a red Ferrari GT California Spyder.

Case in point: Ferris begins his day on the far upper side of Chicago, in one of those fancy North Shore neighborhoods past Northwestern University. He persuades his friend Cameron—who lives in a different fancy neighborhood—to borrow his dad’s Ferrari, pull the subterfuge with his girlfriend at the school and then drive into the city. The clock is already ticking!

But then! A longish discussion with the parking garage attendants. Sightseeing at the then-Sears Tower. Lunch (impersonating Sausage King Abe Froman). More sightseeing at the Chicago Mercantile Exchange. A Cubs game (which typically lasts three hours, by the way) on the north side of town. Then more sightseeing back downtown at the Art Institute, followed by an epic parade crash. By this time, it must be nearly midnight! But no, it’s back up to the northern suburbs (presumably during rush hour), followed by an emotional discussion about life and love with friends, a ridiculously long footrace home and . . . Ferris is back in his bed by the time the folks walk in. By our math, those shenanigans would’ve taken roughly, oh, two days! Or at least 26 hours.

OK, this movie has Ferris talking directly to the camera, unbelievable character development and the sudden appearance of Charlie Sheen, so it’s clearly not meant to be taken too seriously. Still, the geography and timeline in Ferris Bueller’s

Day Off remain a fantastic flaw in an otherwise terrific movie.