Austin American-Statesman

Profession­al driver offers 6 lifesaving tips

- Dear Abby Dear Abby is written by Abigail van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Dear Abby appears on Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Email Dear Abby at www.dearabby.com. Contact Dale Roe at 912592

Dear Abby: I am a profession­al driver. Please allow me to offer some advice to everyone I share the road with:

(1) Please do not honk or display obscene gestures because I am driving the speed limit. It’s not my fault that you’re late.

(2) Please don’t pass me on the right, using the curb lane, parking lane, bike lane or sidewalk. It’s dangerous for me, for you, and for anyone who happens to be in those lanes legally.

(3) Please obey the stop signs, stoplights, yield signs and other signs on the road. They’re there to protect people.

(4) Please put down that breakfast sandwich, cup of coffee, lunch or dinner. If you’re that hungry, pull over to eat.

(5) Please turn off your cellphones while driving. Whatever it is, it can wait. And if it can’t, you have no business being behind the wheel.

(6) If you must discipline your children, please pull over to do it. I have seen drivers wrap their vehicles around trees and lampposts because they had turned around to talk to their child.

I drive more than 1,000 miles a week, and I see more accidents than most will in a lifetime. Many of them could have been avoided simply by paying attention to the road. If you choose to ignore this advice, I can pretty much guarantee that you will injure, or possibly kill, someone eventually. If my letter prevents just one fatality, then it was well worth the time it took to write it. — Milwaukee Mile Man

Dear Mile Man: Thank you for taking the time to write. As both a driver and a passenger, I have seen some frightenin­g near-misses because drivers chose to ignore speed limits and run stop signs and stoplights. Usually the infraction­s are caused less because of thoughtles­sness than by rudeness and an attitude that the rules of the road apply to everyone else.

And please don’t think that automobile drivers are the only transgress­ors, because I have seen bikers and cyclists do some of the same things.

Dear Abby: Why do some people think it’s acceptable to tuck in the tag on my shirt? It’s bad enough when my mother does it, but I have had acquaintan­ces and even strangers do it without asking.

I said something the last time it happened, and the woman had the gall to take offense! All I said was, “Please don’t!” Am I wrong? — Please Don’t in Texas

Dear Please Don’t: I’m sure there are various reasons why people try to tuck in an errant tag from a stranger’s clothing. I suspect they range from attempting to be helpful, to impulsiven­ess to compulsive behavior.

However, because what the woman did made you uncomforta­ble, you were right to tell her that you didn’t like it. She should have asked before touching a stranger because many people are sensitive to any breach of their personal space.

Confidenti­al to My Readers: If you are partying tonight to celebrate the arrival of the new year, please don’t drink and drive.

Make sure you have a designated driver.

I wish you all a happy, healthy, prosperous 2013! — Love, Abby video games with beer. If it can get me junk food from the pantry, I’ll buy one.

“Portlandia” 9 p.m., IFC: Season 3 of the hipster sketch show kicks off with an MTV overthrow and a meditation crush.

Saturday: “NFL Playoff” 7 p.m., NBC: This is a wild-card game, which is much more exciting than a “wild” card game.

Sunday: “The Simpsons” 7 p.m., Fox: Homer goes off the grid and all doomsday prepper.

“The Biggest Loser” 8 p.m., NBC: Jillian Michaels returns as Season 14 begins.

 ?? DISNEY PHOTO ?? Amy Adams in “Enchanted,” airing Monday on NBC.
DISNEY PHOTO Amy Adams in “Enchanted,” airing Monday on NBC.
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