Opening eyes to be thankful, not bitter. Faith,
Speaking thanks in your life can yield a sunnier disposition.
It was one of those mornings. After a bad night’s sleep and preoccupation with work-related minutiae during waking intervals, I slogged to the coffee pot and shuffled to my study. I sat down with my dog and too quickly went through the motions of my morning reading and quiet time.
My mind, however, was light years from my tranquil objective. My usual treasured morning time was more whining than spiritual meditation. Finally, I made it to the health club to meet my good friend for our weekly run and visit. My daily focus so far was sour — on every ache, pain, and problem I felt or could imagine.
Then it happened. The polite and always friendly young man at the counter encouraged me to “have a nice run” as I started to snarl out the door to the trail. He was 30 years or more my junior, but in that moment he was my elder and teacher. A slap in the face or a water cooler full of icy Gatorade on my back could not have awakened me more to the day and its blessings and opportunities.
Unlike me, my young friend had chosen the right attitude that morning. He spoke his kind words without a trace of bitterness or envy from his wheelchair. It immediately transformed me. I just said “thank you” and headed out the door into what was all of a sudden the cool and peaceful morning I had chosen to miss up to that point.
Have you ever turned your eyes around? I had that morning. They were turned inside so that all I could see was myself — as in my self-absorbed self. In contrast, my friend’s eyes were whole, turned out to look at and touch others. His model corrected my focus.
Reflecting without much conversation on my run that morning, I owned the self-pity skewing my perspective on life earlier when I rolled out of bed. Years before on a cold and rare icy morn- ing in Austin, I had chiseled a thick layer of ice off of our steep driveway with an old-fashioned weed blade. It was ill-advised to say the least — not a high IQ moment for me. I was in my usual rush with a type-A determined frenzy to drive 100 dangerous miles to teach my class, despite my wife’s wise counsel that my students would welcome a walk. I furiously hacked away with discomfort until I felt a snap accompanied by acute pain high in my hamstring. I could barely walk and each step hurt.
After decades of running every morning, it would be five months before I took my next compromised running steps. Yet I did take those steps and was able to progress from a strange leg injury. I continue to learn from the challenge and am thankful for the countless blessings I can enjoy through being active.
Yet, I can still descend into the negative, insular cycle of despair and regret about something I can not undo and which, in the greater scheme of things, is not that big a deal.
At the close of her meaningful book Mile Markers, Kristin Armstrong focuses on the importance of gratitude. She challenges readers to set gratitude as a “default” starting point and describes the significance of a “gratitude attitude.” That simple phrase encapsulates the spirit of sincere thanksgiving as a chosen frame of mind and way of life that is at the heart of legitimate religious traditions.
In his letter to the Philippians, St. Paul enjoins his readers not to “worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” The result will be “the peace of God [beyond] all understanding” guarding one’s heart and mind (Philippians. 4: 6-7). In Psalm 34, the Psalmist proclaims: “I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears” (Psalms 34:4).
When I awake each day, I often find that if I calmly and honestly speak my troubles in the context of thankfulness, the result will be serenity which I can experience throughout the day if I persevere with the right disposition.
In contrast, if I start off on the wrong foot into a negative cycle, God often anticipates my prayers before I utter them and rescues me via friends picking me up and reminding me of the better path.
Returning from our run that morning, I walked back into the health club to even more pleasant words from my friend: “How was your run this beautiful morning?” Although I awoke a bitter person that day, I emerged most thank- ful for a true example of a grateful spirit. I resolved again to meet and work through my own challenges with a more consistent perspective of thanksgiving.