Man seems to be a friend only when he needs hand

Austin American-Statesman - - AUSTIN 360 LIFE - Jeanne Phillips Dear Abby

Dear Abby: My hus­band has been so-called friends with a man I’ll call “Roy” for al­most 30 years. Dur­ing the 23 years I have been in the pic­ture, I have no­ticed their friend­ship seems one-sided.

We hear from Roy only when he’s down on his luck or needs help mov­ing or lift­ing some­thing. Last year he be­gan dat­ing some­one new. He has had many girl­friends and we have not met a third of them. Since this courtship be­gan, Roy has changed his num­ber at least four times, and each time, my hus­band has had to call around to get his sup­pos­edly best friend’s phone num­ber.

Well, Roy pro­posed (for the first time ever) to this girl­friend. About a week later he texted my hus­band a photo of the ring with the cap­tion: “She said yes, and you are the best man!” That was over a year ago. My hus­band still hasn’t met the fi­ancee. But other friends of theirs have been in­vited on out­ings and met her dur­ing the year.

I feel Roy is us­ing my hus­band be­cause he knows he makes de­cent money and can come through to fund all the best man du­ties. I don’t want my hus­band to keep play­ing the fool. Is this nor­mal friend be­hav­ior? — Pro­tec­tive in Mis­souri

Dear Pro­tec­tive: No, it’s not. Your hus­band’s “best friend” ap­pears to be a user. From where I sit, he is be­ing treated more as a re­li­able re­source than a friend, let alone a “best” friend. How­ever, after 30 years, your spouse may be so ac­cus­tomed to it that he doesn’t know the dif­fer­ence. How sad.

Dear Abby: A year ago I met the un­touch­able Ice Prince Charm­ing and some­how man­aged to snatch him up a few months ago. But now that he has “de­frosted” and we’re start­ing to set­tle into a re­la­tion­ship, I’m re­al­iz­ing that my “prince” is a bit too charm­ing.

This may sound nuts, but I’m get­ting sick from all the sug­ary sweet af­fec­tion all the time, and I can’t get him to an­swer any­thing for him­self. It’s al­ways, “It doesn’t mat­ter, as long as I’m with you. It doesn’t mat­ter, you’re bet­ter/your opin­ion is bet­ter. You’re so great, amaz­ing, cute, etc. Love you, our kids will be so cute, I wanna marry you, etc.” And noth­ing else. He won’t even let me com­pli­ment him.

We used to have in­tel­lec­tual ar­gu­ments, dumb com­pe­ti­tions, talk all night about fun things we wanted to do one day or just sit around and snark at each other when we weren’t go­ing at our some­times sep­a­rate hob­bies. I know all ev­ery girl wants is her boyfriend to be sweet, so why does it bother me? Am I crazy? How do I get my best friend back? — Un­usual Jersey Girl

Dear Jersey Girl: Here’s how. Tell him ex­actly what you have told me. He may be love drunk, but if that doesn’t sober him up, then it may be time to find a prince who’s less charm­ing and bet­ter suited to you.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS and get­ting along with peers and par­ents is in “What Ev­ery Teen Should Know.” Send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $7 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Teen Book­let, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 61054-0447. (Ship­ping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.)

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from USA

© PressReader. All rights reserved.