What if you’re kicked out of a quarantine pod?
With COVID-19 cases on the rise in some areas, howshould you react when someone kicks you out of your shared quarantine pod?
Q:
A: All of us are attempting to navigate the new reality of COVID-19, and we are doing our best to balance the risks to our physical health with our emotional health. In the absence of clearly established social norms, each of us may need to make different choices from other people in our communities or families. Taking several hours, or even a day, to get some distance from any negative feelings you might have is definitely the right first step. Once you have some space, try asking yourself why you are no longer in your friends’ bubble.
When you talk to your former podmate, lead with compassion, then follow with curiosity. The reason may make complete sense once you have heard it in a calm moment.
— Dr. Ben Michaelis, psychologist and author of ”Your Next Big Thing: Finding Your Passion”
A: Initially you might feel hurt, and let yourself feel those feelings — they are valid — but also don’t jump to conclusions about what this means about you and your friendship. Call on the phone so that communication is clear, and ask about how your friend came to this decision.
You might be surprised by what you hear — that some sort of other extenuating circumstance is motivating it or that your friend has decided to isolate because of stress over the rise in cases. On the other hand, your friend might share that you are, perhaps, not careful enough or that the two of you aren’t vibing well.
These responses will be hard to hear, and it’s OK
to say that you’re hurt, but restrain yourself from sharing judgments about the other person. Being able to say your piece will hopefully bring some closure.
— Dr. Marisa G. Franco, psychologist and friendship expert