Annie's Mailbox

Shower Her With Gratitude

Dear Annie: My girlfriend has done a lot for my family and me, but they show little enthusiasm for her. How can I get them to appreciate her more and to reciprocate what she has done? I live in fear of them attacking her or being cynical about romance itself.

She has helped me to get a raise, helped me get a job, written letters to my family, gotten me a huge discount on rent, given my family free food and done other great things. -- Lazy

and Ungrateful In-laws

Dear Lazy and Un

grateful In-laws: Your girlfriend sounds wonderful and very generous with both her time and finances. Congrats on finding what sounds like a keeper.

As far as your ungrateful parents are concerned, you should speak with them directly and express your concerns. If they continue to be ungrateful, then it might be time to pull back on your girlfriend's generosity. Instead of focusing on your parents, try and focus on your gratitude toward her. I can feel your love and appreciation through this letter.

Let go of your expectations of your parents and spoil her. Take her out to a nice dinner (or, since we're still in lockdown times, cook her a nice dinner), or surprise her with flowers. Just something to tell her you love and appreciate her.

Dear Annie: I have been married for 24 years, and I found out in August that my wife has been involved in an affair since last January. I found out by going through her text messages and confronted her about it. She admitted to it but said that it has not gotten more physical than kissing. Now we are separated because she wouldn't end it, but I still love her.

I am alone now, and she, of course, is still in her relationship outside our marriage, but I would really love to have my family back together. She said that the reason she did it is because she just doesn't love me that way anymore. I am so confused how someone can give up on a marriage that they have been in for half of their life. I have my faults, but I am certainly a good man and have sacrificed so much for my family.

She has agreed to go out to dinner with me, and I am so nervous and excited that I don't even know what to talk about at dinner. Any advice as to what to do? -- Alone and Confused

Dear Alone and Confused:

I am so sorry you are going through this. It is understandable that you still love her. When you have dinner with her, ask if she would be open to going to marriage counseling to try to save your marriage.

If she says no and that she wants to stay in her affair, it is time for you to walk away. Seek the help of a professional therapist for yourself. You sound like a wonderful, thoughtful and loving man with a great deal to offer. I have no doubt you will either rekindle with your wife or find true love with someone else.

Moon Goes Quincunx Happy

ARIES (March 21-April 19). As proven by Sylvester and Tweety, where natural enemies meet, there are endless possibilities for entertainment. There will be no need to take sides today, but do stand ready to intervene.

TAURUS (April

20-May 20). Action geared toward creating stability down the line is favored. Think into the future. What could you start now that would grow to serve you in bigger and more beautiful ways?

GEMINI (May 21June 21). You'll decide on what standards you need to meet, and you're really the only one whose opinion matters here. Others may expect or even pay for things, but ultimately, you are the boss of you.

CANCER (June

22-July 22). While it's nice to be complimented -- awarded, even -- it's of no benefit unless it comes with opportunity. It's the opportunities that give you a chance to build, create and contribute. Make it known; that's what you're after.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You'll be making choices having to do with your personal expression and projection. Style is tricky and personal. What's natural to one person is pretentious to the next. A controlled stretch is better than an impulsive reach.

VIRGO (Aug. 23Sept. 22). Those who care to receive the approval of a leader will compete for favoritism and position. Steer clear of such games. Focus on doing work that could make you indispensable, not just in this group but in any group.

LIBRA (Sept. 23Oct. 23). To rely on someone is to be susceptible to their control. You'll find a partnership in which you can work together for the greater good, neither party needing the relationship too much and both benefiting from it.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24Nov. 21). Today, you respond well to the rules you make for yourself. You have greater powers of self-control at your disposal, in part because certain aspects of your process are starting to become automatic.

SAGITTARIUS

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21). It is dangerous to allow yourself to sail on the winds of compliments or fly on the uplift of accolades. If you can't deflect, accept graciously, and then put it up on a high shelf. It has nothing to do with the work at hand.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You'll solve a problem and gain followers. People who are confused are high-level thinking about how to avoid a co-dependent dynamic.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Power dynamics get worked out. Relax; don't compete. There's nothing to prove. You walk with confidence as the commander of yourself, not with arrogance as the commander of the whole world.

PISCES (Feb.

19-March 20). The beauty in having limited experience in an area is that the early experiences glow with specialness. There's nothing to compare that would tell you easily led. You won't take advantage. You'll do some otherwise. You'll move quickly through this phase, so enjoy it while it lasts.

TODAY'S BIRTHDAY (Dec. 6). You'll grow in power and defend against the abuse of it. It will feel wonderful to do for yourself what you long ago wished someone else would have done for you. Furthermore, you'll get to pay it forward. You'll create a presentation of sorts, and it will bring you money and other resources needed to launch a new venture. Leo and Libra adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 8, 6, 44, 12 and 20.

FORECAST FOR THE WEEK AHEAD:

This week brings the final solar trine of the year, involving the Sagittarius sun with the vigor of Mars in Aries. Sagittarius fire-sign energy is a bow drawn back and ready to send the arrow soaring. Mars in Aries is a cavalry charge. The triangulation offers no resistance. So, what is it you would wage war on?

The enemies of injustice, hatred and greed are ever present in the world, though the plan of attack is tricky. Perhaps the world's evils are better to target within the confines of one's own being. We tend to be most bothered by what we have, at least to some degree, inside of ourselves. To challenge those qualities, question our beliefs and behaviors, and generally keep ourselves in check is to harness the harmonious potential of this week's aspects.

This is also the last full week of Venus in Scorpio and prime time to engage in the art of seduction. Whether you are trying to reel in customers, attract friends and followers, or design a romantic strategy, Venus in Scorpio lends an instinct for pacing as well as hints for a successful approach. This is an excellent week to let space and silence do the work for you. Absence can be highly alluring. Let them miss you and fill in the blanks with their fantasies.