Put honesty on menu for dinner date

From financial and aesthetic points of view, what is appropriate to order during a dinner date? Best be very clear upfront. On a blind or first date, if he or she can’t face a brief, honest discussion about expenses and what level is comfortable for you both, then clearly this date can be the last. Try saying, “I would love to have the lobster, but since we are sharing, I won’t unless you are having it too, or it’s equal.”

Avoid the hamburger or club sandwich, because there is no way they can be eaten gracefully. You don’t want to be shooting mayo on anyone’s lap. Ditto splashy leaf salads with vinaigrette flying everywhere. Avoid soup that is not in a cup.

Same for any food that will make you feel as if you have swallowed a cannonball and make you fall asleep at the table. Too greasy — big steak — or spicy — hot Tex-Mex — will have your stomach noisier than the conversation.

But you can’t run into trouble with a nice piece of fish fillet in a light sauce. — Jeremiah Tower, author of “Table Manners:

How to Behave in the Modern World and Why Bother”

Both people should be prepared to pay the bill.

Don’t take advantage of the other person if he or she offered to pay (for example, don’t order a $200 wine).

Order what you would normally. The idea is that you don’t change your behavior because you’re on a date.

If your date decides to treat you, don’t forget to say, “Thanks, I’d love to take you out next time.” — Lesley-Anne Scorgie, personal finance consultant and author of “The Modern Couple’s Money Guide”