How to confront parents of your child’s bully

You find out your child is being bullied at school. You want to confront the other child’s parents. How do you go about that?

It is important for parents to provide space for their child to process emotions after being bullied. This could look like talking calmly with your child about it, giving him or her space to be upset or offering empathy.

After parents have done these things, I would recommend reaching out to the other child’s parent to set up a one-on-one meeting. Begin by expressing your concern about the interactions between the children. Highlight how your child has been feeling about those interactions. Ask if the other parent is aware of what has been going on.

Express your desire for help changing the other child’s behavior. Try to avoid blaming the parent or talking negatively about his or her child; focus on the behavior you don’t like, not the child’s character.

— Dr. Adia Gooden, clinical psychologist at

the University of Chicago’s Student Counseling Service.

If your child’s school is trained in handling these situations, it is best to involve them. Parents should go to the school and remain calm, asking for the school’s help without making demands.

Parents should be sure the school documents the bullying that is taking place and keeps a record of the school’s proposed actions. Parents can even send a thank-you email to the school after the meeting.