That’s it, I’m outta here!

A man in the emergency room of a hospital in Tallahassee, Fla., was ordered to calm down because he was being disruptive and upsetting other patients. So he called 911 and asked for an ambulance to take him to another hospital. He was arrested for misusing the emergency police number.

HEY, I’M THE VICTIM HERE ... A teenage girl called police to report that two boys came to her home in Greenwood, Ind., and stole the marijuana that she had intended to sell them. She will face charges.

YOU’RE JUST A LITTLE TOO LATE, PAL ... Burglars broke into a pizza joint in Covina, Calif., and stole $1,500. After the owner opened the place up a few hours later, a man with a knife walked in and tried to rob the place. An officer on patrol arrested him.

A LOVELY MEMORY FOR THE BRIDE AND GROOM ... During a wedding reception at the Wildlife Prairie Park in Hanna City, Ill., two intoxicated groomsmen and a guest climbed the fence and started chasing after bison that were grazing there. The animals remained calm until security officers came and took the trespassers away.

SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS ... CHOMP! CHOMP! ... A woman has gone to almost every funeral at Holy Redeemer Church in Berkshire, England, for the past 14 years so she can partake of the free food. Mourners at one recent funeral said that they figured out that she did not know the deceased, and that she was seen going at the buffet spread “like there was no tomorrow.”

NOW THAT’S WHAT WE CALL A CLUE ... A teenager who was wanted for murder in Texas was arrested when he posted his location in Los Angeles in a live video on social media.

WE APPRECIATE YOUR HONESTY, MA’AM ... A woman went into a liquor store in Saskatchewan and announced to employees that she was going to steal a bottle of vodka, which she then proceeded to do. After drinking some of it down and dropping the bottle on the ground, she was taken to the Prince Albert Correctional Center, where she created a disturbance and was arrested. Drugs were thought to be a factor.

LET’S CHECK THE TRAILER TO SEE WHAT WE’VE GOT ... UH-OH! ... Thieves stole an SUV with a U-Haul trailer that contained a dead man in a casket outside a motel in Albuquerque, N.M. The dead man's daughter was bringing her father's body to Kirtland, N.M., from Oklahoma for burial. The casket was recovered nearby.