‘It’s really important to me to feel like I can be who I am’
Pi Fong — who chooses to use the pronoun “they” — was raised a girl but never felt like they belonged with girls — or boys.
In college, Pi came out as a “non-binary” transgender person. So being asked to check male or female on a driver’s license, applications and countless forms has always been upsetting and frustrating for Pi.
Sometimes, Pi just avoids filling out paperwork.
But yesterday, the state Senate passed a bill that could allow people who don’t identify as male or female to choose X in the gender box on the driver’s license applications. It’s already the law in Oregon, California and Maine. People in Massachusetts could opt to have an “X” on their licenses as soon as November.
Getting a new license, Pi said, is going to be the “best day.”
“It’s really important to me to feel like I can be who I am and not have to reveal my gender history to other people in the world,” Pi told me yesterday. “And to be able to have a document that says my gender exists and my gender exists in a way that is recognized and makes me feel like I can be more of myself in my community.”
State Sen. Karen Spilka (D-Ashland) filed the bill after a non-binary high schooler in her district wrote her, saying how stressful it was to choose a gender on a driver’s license.
Growing up, Pi always knew they were different than other girls.
“I never felt like I belonged with the girls but I also never felt like I belonged with the boys,” Pi said. “I ended up spending a lot of time feeling stuck in between, especially because our childhoods are so gendered.”
While at Clark University, Pi came out as a nonbinary transgender person to friends and then family. “It was hard sometimes. My freshman year I lived in the women’s dorm,” Pi recalled. “It was a really hard space to be in.”
“Overall,” Pi added, “I’ve had a really supportive experience.”
Now 25, Pi is the regional field director for the Freedom for All Massachusetts coalition in Worcester and western Massachusetts, which is seeking to uphold the transgender protection law.
“It really says a lot to me that Massachusetts wants to include transgender folks or non-binary folks in their community when they let us check the box that feels best for us,” Pi said. “Instead of forcing us to check a box that will never feel good.”