THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN
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Behind every hero is a villain ready to strike first, strike hard, no mercy! From Johnny’s sweeping of the leg in “The Karate Kid” to Regina George’s poison pen and Burn Book in “Mean Girls” to Ivan Drago’s Zen wisdom of “If he dies, he dies” in “Rocky 4,” corny and cruel villains have only needed to be bad.
Generally, we have had little need for backstory, for motivation. Johnny was a jerk who couldn’t handle a crane kick. That was enough.
But Netflix and YouTube dared to delve into the dysfunctional world of Johnny Lawrence with “Cobra Kai.” Launched by YouTube in 2018 and acquired by Netflix for its third season, which came out Jan. 1, “Cobra Kai” continues the story of the “The Karate Kid” film series from Johnny’s point of view. Not another failed remake in the mold of 2012’s “Red Dawn” or 2015’s “Point Break,” “Cobra Kai” has William Zabka and Ralph Macchio reprising their original roles — a smart artistic and financial choice, as it has become a massive hit with both critics and fans.
With Hollywood constantly struggling for fresh ideas, expect other production companies to try and recreate the success of “Cobra Kai.” In an effort to coax the burgeoning trend in satisfying directions, here are a few villains our nostalgia-crazed culture deserves to catch up with.
The Fratellis from “The Goonies”
“The Goonies” gang reunited late last year for a live script reading to benefit the charity No Kid Hungry. Riding the buzz of that success, the characters should get an update, specifically Fratelli brothers Jake and Francis. Sure the dastardly pair are probably still doing hard time for trying to kill half a dozen children. But actors Robert Davi and Joe Pantoliano are treasures so let’s break them out of the big house (something the Fratelli family can surely handle) with revenge on their mind. Sadly, Anne Ramsey who played Mama died in 1988 and Sloth actor John Matuszak passed away a year later so we’ll have to settle for a prequel series for their oddly-dark-for-a-kids’-movie story. Maybe the team behind “Bates Motel” has a few ideas.
Steff McKee from “Pretty in Pink”
The resurgence of James Spader has been a wonderful thing to watch. His turn as manipulative and duplicitous Robert California on “The Office” was an excruciating delight and he added much needed swagger and silliness to “Avengers: Age of Ultron.” Can we please see him navigating the modern world as the perpetually drunk and absurdly offensive Steff? While the character would probably just be spending his days playing golf in Florida, a more interesting twist would have him sleeping on the couch in Andie and Blane’s basement after some disastrous investing choices from DeLorean to Crystal Pepsi to Microsoft’s Zune.
Veruca Salt from “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory”
Veruca wants her own series and she wants it now! How about this: Charlie has run the Wonka factory to the brink of bankruptcy — sorry, but that kid had no head for business. Salt, now the CEO of her father’s successful peanut shelling factory, is looking to take over the candy company and finally get herself a goose that lays a golden chocolate-filled egg. But … is there romance in the air? No? OK, fine, but cameos from Augustus Gloop, Violet Beauregarde and Mike Teavee are mandatory.