Dear Abby: Widow feels completely isolated after losing husband

Dear Abby: My husband passed away four months ago, after battling cancer for years. This was even more depressing because it happened during COVID.

After my husband’s death, all the emotional support stopped — no family visits and no phone calls. If I don’t text, I have no contact with anyone. After a marriage of 55 years, I am totally isolated and alone. I have meltdowns at times over nothing. Sleep escapes me. Grief counseling is shut down except for Zoom, and I don’t have a computer.

I know it takes years to adjust to a new way of life, but my mobility issues aren’t helping. It takes me forever to get around. Abby, I’m not sure how to proceed from here. Any suggestions for moving forward? — Too Much Change

in Florida Dear Too Much Change: Yes! Place a call to your physician and tell them what’s going on. Because you have no computer, peer-to-peer grief counseling by phone may be an option. There might be help for your sleep problems as well. As to your meltdowns, in time they will lessen. But you must accept that grieving is a process that takes time.

When you feel isolated, do you pick up the phone and call others, or do you expect them to do the calling? A step toward independence would be to make yourself reach out to others. You might consider adopting a dog, which would force you to get out of the house — which is healthy — but also give you an opportunity to meet others.

I know it’s sometimes an effort to just get out of bed. But if you start doing these things, they are all steps in the right direction and will help you to reclaim your life.