Dear Abby: Woman gets visit from mother-in-law – complete with COVID

Dear Abby: My husband and I are expecting. Our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage, so we were overjoyed to find out I was pregnant again, this time with a little girl. We’ve already given her the name “Mandy.”

Everything was going well until a month ago. My motherin-law came over for her birthday. I hadn’t seen her all weekend. Because our relationship isn’t as good as it could be, I didn’t ask her why. Two days later she announced to my husband she had COVID and we should get tested, too. She had spent that entire weekend out, seeing people and going places. Then she came to our home where I was 21 weeks pregnant and doing everything to keep this pregnancy.

I became violently ill and, although I recovered, I spent three nights in the hospital because our baby is now suffering from my being sick. I am now on bed rest. We have no option other than getting through day by day to help buy Mandy more time to grow. I am struggling with anger toward my MIL, but I’m trying to stay positive and avoid the toxicity so Mandy has a fighting chance. When all this settles down, how do I even begin to address this with my MIL?

— Incensed in the East

Dear Incensed: You are doing the right thing by focusing on your baby. How you deal with her should be guided by the answer to this question: When your motherin-law learned you were sick because she exposed you, did she apologize?

If she knew she “had a little something” and came over anyway, let that guide you and your husband in your interactions with her because her judgment is atrocious. If not, try to forgive her for this awful scare and let her build bridges if she’s capable of it.