Hurting mom feels mistreated

DEAR ABBY >> I have a daughter, “Molly,” who is in her late

30s. Her father and I divorced when she was an infant, and I raised her, with help from my family. Her father had visitation and paid child support, but that’s it. Throughout Molly’s life, I have taken care of all medical expenses, extracurricular activities, etc., and I sacrificed so she could have what she needed.

The problem is she treats me badly, while her father, his family, her husband’s family and others are put on a pedestal. The disrespectful way she talks to me and her attitude have sent me into depression. She doesn’t return my calls unless she wants something.

I may be coming into some money soon, and I’ve been thinking about changing my will and not leaving her anything. I am seeing a therapist to learn why I can’t tell her how much her words and actions hurt me. I love Molly, but I don’t like her. Shouldn’t she be the one in therapy to figure out why she treats me this way?

— Mistreated Mom

in Georgia

DEAR MOM >> People don’t usually seek therapy unless they are hurting, as you are. Don’t waste your time waiting for her to seek help for something she doesn’t think is a problem. Your daughter is fine with the status quo. I don’t know if she’s aware you may come into money, but when she finds out, you may discover she has a sudden change of attitude.

If the money comes through, I hope you will spend that windfall on things you enjoy — travel, cultural events, all the activities you missed out on while sacrificing for Molly. You deserve it; she doesn’t. Please tell your therapist I said so. I’m quite sure your therapist will agree.