Boston Herald

Biden’s intelligen­ce lights up the world like a 3-watt bulb

- Order Howie’s new book, “Paper Boy: Read All About It!” at howiecarrs­how.com or amazon.com.

Dementia Joe Biden this week came up with his new campaign slogan for this year’s campaign.

“Elect me,” he said. “I’m in the 20, the 20th century, 21st century.”

One of those centuries, anyway. You know, the thing.

As always, all dialogue guaranteed verbatim. What follows are just some of Biden’s public pronouncem­ents over the last six weeks or so.

Let’s begin with March Madness. On Monday, UConn won its second consecutiv­e men’s national title in basketball. The winner always goes to the White House (unless Donald Trump is president) to accept congratula­tions.

Donovan Clingan was the Huskies’ starting center. This week for a podcast Clingan recalled the team’s 2022 visit to 1600 Pennsylvan­ia Avenue.

“Last year after we won a national championsh­ip, went to the White House. Took a picture with Joe Biden, took a team picture. Joe Biden talked to us for about three minutes and then right after, he asked for a picture again.”

Yeah, that sounds about right. Biden had forgotten the first photo because it had been snapped, like, three minutes earlier. And that was a year ago, when he was only 80 years old.

Do you suppose his dementia has improved since then?

The podcast host asked Clingan if anything else happened that day with Biden.

“Completely ignored Coach Hurley, really couldn’t understand what he was saying and then he’s, ‘All right, let’s grab a picture.’”

That’s it for the sports report. Now back to the news of the day.

On his way to a state dinner at the White House, Biden was asked by a reporter, “Do you have a message to Iran on behalf of Israel?””

“Thank you all,” he crisply replied. “Appreciate it!”

He now requires note cards to say “Welcome” to a visiting world leader. He claimed he has “dramatical­ly reduced inflation.” He lied about “reducing” the deficit by a trillion. He told another huge whopper about not raising taxes on anybody making under $400,000.

No fact checkers appeared anywhere in staterun media to correct any of his false statements.

With his crackhead bagman son’s trial on incometax evasion charges scheduled to start on June 3, the Big Guy thundered to Americans, “Pay your fair share!”

Discussing still more handouts for the Ukrainian oligarchs, Biden first confused $310 million with billion. Then tried to explain where he could get more appropriat­ions, only he couldn’t remember the word “Congress.”

Not a joke! He couldn’t come up with the word Congress. At a different event, he called insulin “insinin.” He came out against “sexual effuse assault and domestic abuse.”

Talking about how many illegal aliens would be allowed to invade the country daily under the derailed “bipartisan” legislatio­n, Biden first said 500,000 a day, then corrected it to the real number, 5,000.

A Freudian slip, perhaps? The faster the Democrats can get these tens of millions of criminal foreign freeloader­s into the US, the quicker the entire society finishes imploding into the Third World hellhole they’re dreaming of ruling forever.

On the campaign trail, Biden told an audience that “I, like an awful lot of people in his audience, was the first in my family to go to college.”

That too was a complete lie. Recall his innumerabl­e brags about his grandfathe­r’s allegedly storied grid career as an AllAmerica­n at Santa Clara.

This week Brandon said he owed everything to the Greek-American community in which he was raised in Delaware.

“Not hyperbole,” he added, in one of his tells that indicate that he’s lying.

For those keeping score at home, Biden has now claimed to have been raised in the Puerto Rican, Persian, Polish, Italian, Irish, Catholic, Jewish, black and now Greek communitie­s of Delaware.

After this latest transforma­tion, into Zorba the Geek, the Republican National Committee put out a tweet with all Biden’s ethnic brags. It ran 1:50.

He accused Republican­s of scheming to “kill” people, then angrily denounced the level of hateful rhetoric in the country.

“All kidding aside,” he said in another tell, “the way we denigrate people! The way we talk about people…. What the hell is this? It’s never been like this. It’s gotta stop!”

His press secretary was asked about Brandon’s accusation that the GOP wants to kill people.

Brandon’s below-average flack criticized the reporter for using the “most extreme, extreme definition or extreme evaluation” of the word… kill.

Here are a few more of Brandon’s Greatest Hits, March—April edition:

“I will never stop to deliver student debt relief.”

“We both remember the choices that were made to forge a friendship that were once only a devastatin­g fight that existed before.”

“Why did I commute every single day over a million miles round trip over the time I was in the United States Senate.”

“This is in addition to the ‘storic investment­s we’re making to modivize, mo-moderize our infrastruc­ture.”

“I made it clear I see a future I see I see a future where we defend democracy not diminish it.”

“Why don’t everybody holler at once?”

“Third, next question. Who do I call on next? Hang on a second. I got my list here. Hang on. I apologize.”

“We’ve had very dis-pect meetings with union leadership — not a joke.”

“We’re the only nation in the world divided and divined defined.”

“And as I maybe said to you before we started I don’t remember how we said when we started.”

It’s probably too late now, but the Democrats could pivot and nominate the vice president, Kamala Harris.

Like Brandon, her intelligen­ce lights up the world like a three-watt bulb.

Here is the beginning of one of Kamala’s appearance­s last week at the White House. As with Brandon, all dialogue guaranteed verbatim.

“Thank you thank you thank you good afternoon good afternoon good afternoon good afternoon thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you. Thank you all and good afternoon.

May we quote you on that, Madame Vice President?

 ?? ANDREW HARNIK — GETTY IMAGES ?? U.S. President Joe Biden turns to answer a reporters question following a joint press conference with Japanese Prime Minister Fumio Kishida in the Rose Garden at the White House on Wednesday in Washington, DC.
ANDREW HARNIK — GETTY IMAGES U.S. President Joe Biden turns to answer a reporters question following a joint press conference with Japanese Prime Minister Fumio Kishida in the Rose Garden at the White House on Wednesday in Washington, DC.
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