Syfy goes psychotronic with ‘Blood Drive’
Are old-school exploitation movies still shocking? Or merely amusing? Syfy kicks off summer with the new series “Blood Drive” (10 p.m., TV-MA), a ludicrously overthe-top take on dystopian road movies from the 1970s.
Filled with gore, gangs of punks and freaks, endless chase scenes and gratuitous sexual innuendo, “Drive” touches all the bases. For starters, the title is a cheap pun, a nod to the day when freaky film aficionados scoured video stores for tattered VHS copies of films like “Basket Case” and “I Dismember Mama.” The film’s plot and central conceit concerns a cross-country race through the ruins of America, taking place in the far-off “future” of 1999.
As in “Mad Max” and “Death Race 2000,” conditions are horrendous and gasoline is at a premium. But that’s no problem, because these polished vintage Detroit classics have been retrofitted to run on human blood.
When femme fatale Grace D’Argento (Christina Ochoa) checks under the hood, we see a corpse-grinding apparatus that provides the fuel and a few ghoulish laughs. It’s like Audrey from “Little Shop of Horrors” with a Body by Fisher.
The whole thing is ridiculous. Like the cars themselves, the production values and cinematography are all a tad too slick and shiny to do justice to the cheap and dirty aesthetics of the genre.
This effort and so many other retro “Grindhouse” films seem like film-school-educated talent doing a little creative slumming. It’s not clever to name your central character after Italian slasher-movie director Dario Argento. It’s obvious. And so is “Blood Drive.” It’s a reference-heavy take on exploitation classics dumbed down for the era of “Sharknado 5.”
‘HANDMAID’S’ FINALE
Serena Joy vents her rage on Offred and the Commander in the 10th and final episode of “The Handmaid’s Tale,” streaming on Hulu today.
Spoiler alert: While this last chapter ends in a manner quite similar to Margaret Atwood’s 1985 dystopian novel, it offers enough variations to make way for a second season that will stream in 2018.
“Handmaid’s” arrival on Hulu coincided with Netflix’s truecrime series “The Keepers.” Both involve the gruesome oppression and sexual abuse of women by twisted religious authorities. Only “Handmaid’s” is a fantasy, and “Keepers” is based on grim real events that took place less than 50 years ago. Both are harrowing and addictive.
FILL IN THE EMOJI
Social-media symbols meet on a wheel of fortune to become “Emogenius” (9 p.m., GSN, TV-PG), a new game show inviting contestants to complete phrases and solve puzzles using emojis.
OTHER HIGHLIGHTS
› A rocker works as a roadie on “Undercover Boss” (8 p.m., CBS, repeat, TV-PG).
› ESPN concludes its epic five-hour documentary “Celtics/ Lakers: Best of Enemies” (8 p.m., ESPN).
› Kal Penn (“Superhuman”) guest-stars on “The F Word With Gordon Ramsay” (9 p.m., Fox, TV-14).
› A mystery predator consumes the pets on the second-season premiere of “Homestead Rescue” (10 p.m., Discovery)
› Emmit spills to Gloria on “Fargo” (10 p.m., FX, TV-MA).
› Barry mulls medical schools on “The Goldbergs” (8 p.m., ABC, repeat, TV-PG).
› The Mystery Box Challenge on “MasterChef” (8 p.m., Fox, TV-14).
› Wrestler Cody Rhodes guest-stars on “Arrow” (8 p.m., CW, repeat, TV-14).
› Fortunes told on “Speechless” (8:30 p.m., ABC, repeat, TV-PG).
› A stranger poses as Lewis’ brother on “Criminal Minds” (9 p.m., CBS, repeat, TV-14).
› Too relaxed on “Modern Family” (9 p.m., ABC, repeat, TV-14).
› No business like Shogun business on “DC’s Legends of Tomorrow” (9 p.m., CW, repeat, TV-14).
› Sleeplessness on “American Housewife” (9:30 p.m., ABC,
repeat, TV-PG).
› A victim needs special surgery on “Code Black” (10 p.m., CBS, repeat, TV-14).
› Inventions on display on “Steve Harvey’s Funderdome” (10 p.m., ABC, repeat, TV-PG).
Contact Kevin McDonough at kevin.tvguy@gmail.com.