Cycle of abuse is the sad legacy of sexual predator
DEAR ABBY: I recently moved to Texas and met my teenage niece for the first time. After I got there I learned she had been molested by her mother’s father at age 3. He had also molested her mother when she was a child. “Grandpa” is currently serving a life sentence in prison.
Abby, my niece has some issues. Her parents caught her sexting twice that I know of and took her phone away for a period of time. She was also accused of touching her 8-year-old niece and was ordered to knock it off.
She told me she showers with her mother and asked to shower with me. When I refused, she became abusive. When I tried to tell my brother she needs professional help, he told me to mind my own business.
If I report this, I risk never seeing anyone in my family again, but I love my niece and I’m afraid for her. Her mother has already limited my contact with her, and I’m afraid Mom needs help as much as my niece. Please help. None of this makes sense to me. Why won’t they get her help?
— DESPERATELY NEEDS HELP
DEAR DESPERATELY: They won’t get help because it appears that in their lives inappropriate sexual behavior may have become an ingrained family affair. You are right that the mother needs as much help as your niece, and your brother should not be covering for his wife.
You should report what’s going on to child protective services. While you probably won’t be thanked for it, you may be able to interrupt the cycle of incest and molestation.
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