Chattanooga Times Free Press

Full cup for both Joes, Tommy Tuberville’s blown call, a full Wednesday, obit observatio­n

- JAY GREESON Contact Jay Greeson at jgreeson@timesfreep­ress.com.

Many of you know that I went to Auburn. Hey, they threw a diploma in my window heading to Panama City, so I figured I’d stay awhile.

That makes me familiar with the head-scratching thoughts and decisions of former Tigers football coach Tommy Tuberville.

The newly elected U.S. senator from Alabama is doing his best version of arguably the most recognizab­le Alabaman to ever go to Washington, D.C. — Mr. Forrest Gump.

“We probably could have had a swearing-in and inaugurati­on later after we got this virus behind us a little bit,” Tuberville said this week, putting a real-life “Stupid is as stupid does” spin on things.

Uh, coach, you know that the inaugurati­on is scheduled in accordance to what our forefather­s put in the Constituti­on?

And we just thought Tuberville’s decision-making on fourth-down was bad. Punt, Tommy, punt.

SPEAKING OF THE INAUGURATI­ON

Sometimes, the convergenc­e of timing is so interwoven it makes me need to sit down and take a deep breath.

Be it behind the wheel of a car or the random phone call from someone you were about to ring up.

Wednesday may be the all-timer, though.

How about this overlap? Joe Biden will be sworn in. (Again, Coach Tuberville, it’s the law.)

Reports state that could be the day that Donald Trump’s impeachmen­t trial starts.

And if that’s not enough, it’s the one-year anniversar­y of the first confirmed COVID-19 case in the U.S.

FULL WEEK FOR BOTH JOES

Man, I’m glad the Aussies gave Joe the Pigeon a pass.

After we put up with the Wiggles, multiple vehicles with Crocodile Dundee and still actually refer to their tennis tournament as a major, the least they could do is give Joe a reprieve.

Of course, the bird was named for President-elect Biden, who is also very busy this week.

On Thursday, Biden announced a $1.9 trillion stimulus plan. Sure, it has designs on speeding up the vaccine, which everyone is for.

It also has another $1,400 stimulus check to Americans, another round of carpet bombing with checks rather than appropriat­e measures. There are a lot of people who need and deserve our help. There will also be billions wasted in the process, and wasted at a time when debt is skyrocketi­ng.

Oh yeah, Biden said his relief bill will be paid with borrowed money.

It also drew praise from Pelosi for including liberal priorities like moving the minimum wage to $15 a hour.

That sure didn’t take long, did it?

OBIT OBSERVATIO­NS

Reading the TFP obits, do you wonder how people will remember you? I know I do.

And when I saw the opening paragraph for Jack Chandler, who died Wednesday at the age of 95, it made me remember that we can always wear more hats.

Jack’s life was full. Husband, father, grandfathe­r, great-grandfathe­r. Believer.

Soldier, serving in the Navy in World War II.

Hard worker, be it at TVA or in constructi­on.

Public servant, be it City Council, police commission­er or an officer with the city of Ft. Oglethorpe.

Rest easy Jack, goodness knows you’ve earned it.

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