DAILY BRIDGE CLUB

“My doctor says that the key to healthy living is to start each day with a good breakfast,” Unlucky Louie remarked to me in the club lounge.

“So you’ve gotten with the program?” I asked.

“I’m trying,” Louie said sadly, “but my old toaster has two settings: ‘too soon’ and ‘too late.’ ”

Louie also has timing problems as declarer. He habitually plays too fast. Against Louie’s 3NT in today’s deal, West led the 10 of clubs, and Louie hastily took five rounds, pitching two diamonds. East discarded three diamonds and the deuce of spades, and West threw a spade. Louie next tried the K-Q of hearts and a heart to dummy’s ace, hoping for a 3-3 break, but West threw another spade.

Louie gritted his teeth and, at the ninth trick, led a spade from dummy toward his king. East played the ace ... and when he cashed his jack of hearts next, Louie waffled over what to discard. His hand was squeezed like a pitcher of orange juice.

If Louie threw his king of spades, the defense would take another spade and the K-A of diamonds. So Louie threw another diamond instead, but then West pitched the queen of spades. The defense took the K-A of diamonds and West’s last diamond, and Louie’s contract was burned toast.

Louie can bring home the bacon with better timing. He must test the hearts at Trick Two. When West discards on the third heart, Louie leads a spade toward his king to get his ninth trick.

“I never sausage a deal,” I told Louie apologetically.

South dealer

N-S vulnerable