Fathers can help stem violence

Maudlyne Ihejirika alluded to it in her article on “The Magic of Mentoring,” while community activists like Andrew Holmes and others have brought it up. But in the search for answers to the never-ending cycle of violence in our area, what can never be emphasized enough is the role more fathers need to take in bringing up their children.

While it’s not impossible for a boy in particular to become successful without the guidance, positive example and love a father can provide, it’s difficult for even the bestintentioned mother or grandmother alone to keep a boy from giving in to pressure by peers and young adults to head the wrong way once he reaches adolescence. You can imagine the reaction he would get if he said, “My grandma wouldn’t like it if I did that.”

What is probably even worse is becoming aware, at a young age, that his father actually lives in the area but doesn’t make an effort to be part of a boy’s life. How can society expect a boy growing up with that knowledge to think anything but, “If he doesn’t care about me, why should I care about anyone else?” Being handed a gun by an older male to take part in a crime could easily encourage him to think, if only subconsciously, that, “Here is someone who thinks I am important and can be trusted to do something big.”

What did Michael Jordan, the Williams sisters and Tiger Woods have in common, besides being determined, talented and Black? They all had fathers who took a direct role in their upbringing and guided them into becoming the best they could be. Other fathers can do much the same in other ways just by showing their love and setting a worthy example.

J.L. Stern, Highland Park