DAILY BRIDGE CLUB

I was relaxing in the club lounge when a kibitzer came in from the penny game.

“The players are in there planning Grapefruit’s funeral,” he said.

“Doesn’t he have to be dead first?”

“I think that’s being arranged also.”

Grapefruit, our sourpuss member, believes that the best defense is to be strongly offensive. He badgers his partners to death. As today’s West, he cashed two spades against four hearts. South ruffed the third spade and casually led a diamond: four, ace, nine.

South then drew trumps, took his high clubs and led a diamond. East had to win and lead a black card, and South pitched a diamond loser and ruffed in dummy. He made his game, and Grapefruit announced that East was depriving a village somewhere of its idiot.

When declarer led a diamond to the ace, East should have been suspicious. Declarer clearly didn’t have the Q-J and was unlikely to have Q-x. If East throws his king under the ace, South loses two diamonds and goes down.

Your partner opens one diamond, you respond one heart and he bids two clubs. What do you say?

ANSWER: Your partnership agreement is a factor. If you’ ve agreed that a jump preference in opener’s minor is forcing, a bid of three diamonds is ideal. But if your partnership treats that bid as invitational (you might hold