Call out ageism
Age-related shaming can occur anywhere — a cold shoulder at the cosmetics counter, a deaf ear at community meetings and, especially, the obtuseness of the medical system.
Ageism and age discrimination are different. Age discrimination raises its ugly head in institutions, corporations and housing. But ageism is subtle and not that complex. When someone addresses me as “young lady,” the implication is that young is good and old is bad. If I act flattered, I’m perpetuating the stigma.
The term “senior moment” is a joke about memory loss related to aging, which is treated like an embarrassment rather than a normal part of getting old. A friend, an 80-year-old grandmother who likes Chance the Rapper and marches in anti-racism demonstrations, is often called “young at heart.” “Young at heart” diminishes the lifelong experiences that have brought her to her own reckonings.
Yes, ageism is subtle, but really, it’s not so complex.
People in power have implicit biases, baked in at birth, passed down from generations like old recipes. Their unrealized thoughts are that people much older are close to death, or that they have had “full lives” or that they no longer care to survive. These never-expressed sentiments guide public policy.
Becoming aware of our inner ageism requires self-education and introspection. But when we experience ageism from others, we tend to think, “This is my problem,” rather than, “This is our problem.” Dismantling ageist thinking and behavior requires collective action, just like movements against racism, sexism and ableism.
Anti-ageism activism is about making personal suffering public. “In our society, there is this endless drumbeat of youth. We need to challenge the underlying message that age decreases your value,” writes Ashton Applewhite, author of “This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism” and the blog “Yo, Is This Ageist?”
Anti-ageism activism starts with each of us calling it out when we see it or experience it. We all want to grow old — but we want to be old with all of our personhood and dignity intact.
— Phyllis Mitzen, Skyline Village Chicago