Difficult road after surprise pregnancy

When I found I was pregnant, I was already three months in. The pregnancy was not planned, so I didn’t notice at first.

It will bemy second child. I already have a 12-year-old girl. But to be frank, my husband and I were not excited about it.

Having a second child means big changes to our current life. It would cost a fortune to raise another child in Beijing, and we will be kept busy for another 20 years in order to take good care of the child. Both of us are 42 years old, we are not young anymore. We had discussions over and over again about whether we should keep the baby.

When we finally decided to embrace this new family member, I was four months pregnant. I went to several big hospitals and tried to secure a bed for delivery, but they all turned me down.

The obstetricians I saw were all surprised that I came to them so late in the pregnancy. They said that nowadays, pregnant women should go to hospital as soon as they know that they are pregnant to register, as early as five or six weeks along.

I was surprised as well, because when I had my first child (in 2004), I was told not to see an obstetrician until I was at least 3 months pregnant. Women in the early stages of pregnancy have a high chance of miscarriage.

After I was turned down by several hospitals, I felt disheartened and almost thought of giving up.

Without much hope, I asked a friend whom I knew when I gave birth tomy first child— we were in the same maternity ward— if she knew anyone at a hospital. She helped me register at Beijing Tian Tan Hospital, which is famous for its neurosurgery department.

I am grateful to her, really. Otherwise I cannot imagine where I would go when I am due in December.