A pill solution just pops up

Is it true that you’re never too old to learn — or was I just never that smart in the first place?

Ever since I can remember, I have been unable to swallow pills, a quirk for which many readers have offered creative solutions through the years.

Thank you for your suggestions and please don’t give up on me. Yes, I tried putting a pill on my tongue and drinking a large glass of water as though the pill wasn’t there. While I was well hydrated from all the water, the pill grabbed onto my tongue like a life raft and remained intact, albeit a little roughed up.

I once attempted swallowing a single grain of uncooked rice. No matter what substance I tried, my swallowing mechanism refused the offer.

In my younger years, the same mother who painted the still life that sits on my mantel meticulously crushed my pills and mixed them with something sweet, a routine I continued as an adult.

My pill-crushing tool of choice became a mortar and pestle, crafted from stone, a gift from my friend Jeanette who brought it back from Turkey where she had been a Peace Corps volunteer. Sturdy and stubborn, it crushed even the hardest pills.

Up until a few weeks ago, my mornings began by mincing whatever medication I had to take and pouring the contents into a teaspoon, which I took with an orange juice chaser. For pills that are not supposed to be crushed, understanding doctors found alternative medications for me.

One recent morning as I dropped my pills into a spoon, I received a phone call that distracted me for about five minutes. When I returned to the kitchen, the pills had melted. Apparently, there had been some water in the spoon.

In an instant, all those years of crushing, hammering and stabbing were put to rest. The pills had dissolved into a pool of multicolored liquid that went down as smoothly as a glass of wine.

While it would have been nice if I could have discovered this option many years earlier, it also gives me a glint of hope. Maybe it’s not too late for me to actually swallow one of those puppies whole someday. I love living in possibility.