Last word on astrology
Wednesday, Jan. 20, 2021 Happy Birthday: Keep in mind who you are dealing with this year and how best to use your skills, knowledge and insight to reach your goal. It will take your undivided attention and willingness to adapt to the changes taking place if you want to come out ahead. Dig deep, analyze and make adjustments that will help you maintain your position. Your numbers are 7, 18, 24, 26, 35, 39, 44.
Aries (March 21-April 19): Pay close attention to what’s going on around you. Distance yourself from situations that appear risky, manipulative or underhanded. Don’t let anyone rope you into spending more than you can afford or taking on responsibilities that don’t belong to you. 666
Taurus (April 20-May 20): Make a sound decision, not a snap decision. Indecisiveness regarding your work, position, status or what to do with your life will result in confusion and worry. Time is on your side; explore your options, and don’t feel pressured to act prematurely. 666
Gemini (May 21-June 20): Listen carefully, take notes and ask questions. What you learn today will help you get ahead in life, love or at work. Your sensitivity toward others will help you pick up additional information that will be valuable when negotiating. 6666
Cancer (June 21-July 22): Reach out to people who share your beliefs and interests. The relationships you form will encourage you to use your imagination more and to focus on new possibilities. Accept the inevitable, and refuse to let anyone get in your way. 6666
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): An offer will have a hidden agenda. Go over the fine print, make adjustments and refuse to let anyone cause problems for you at work. Protect your reputation, use your intelligence and be prepared for whatever comes your way. Don’t overspend. 66
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): A change of pace will give you a chance to evaluate a confusing situation. A partnership will encourage you to look at the positive, deal with the negative and proceed with confidence. Trust your instincts. Romance is favored. 66666
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Trust what you know, despite opposition. Work you can do from home will give insight into an alternative way to earn more money. Check out your options. Be clear about the way you feel and what you intend to do. 666
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): A problem with a colleague, friend or relative will surface if you procrastinate or change your mind. Be careful how you approach situations that depend on others. Use diplomacy and persuasion to get your way. 666
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Keep your life simple. Avoid overspending and excessiveness. Don’t believe or trust someone who is vague or too complimentary. Consider making a lifestyle change that incorporates better health, moderation and educational pursuits that can help you get ahead. 66666
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Set reasonable goals, and stick to your plans. Refuse to let trivial matters interfere. Anger will take away from what you are trying to accomplish. Set high standards, and focus on getting results. Personal change is worth considering. 66
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Speak up, and share your thoughts and intentions. Don’t fold under pressure or make an abrupt change because someone else does. Follow your heart, do your own thing and refuse to let anyone get in your way. Use charm to get your way. 6666
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Let go of the past. Take care of your health and physical wellbeing. Don’t take unnecessary risks or make hasty decisions that might result in illness or injury. Put your energy where it counts most and will bring you the highest returns. 666
By Thomas Joseph
Dear Amy: Iama26year-old woman in a “friends with benefits” relationship with “Paul” (age 28).
Paul and I had clearly agreed on casual sex and a no-strings-attached formula, but it seems like I have fallen for him.
He is the perfect man I had always imagined my par tner to be.
I think he also has feelings for me, but maybe he is too scared to show his affection and to tell me how he really feels. He often talks about how much he likes me and at the same time brings up his other love interests. This puts me in a ver y confused state.
I do not know if he loves me or is just playing games with me. How do I know if this man really loves me?
Dear Confused: Your question illustrates the idea that — for some people — expressing honesty and emotional intimacy seems to be more challenging than tolerating the uncer tainty and other related risks of having casual sex.
The stor yline that you and “Paul” are currently enacting is age-old. It is the stuff of rom-coms and romance novels (“Bridgerton,” anyone?).
If you are bold enough, you could under take the developmental experience of jumping of f the emotional clif f by simply telling the truth. After doing so, you will inspire either a delightful and surprising expression of same, an upsetting (but brief) confession your feelings are not reciprocated, or an expression of a muddled in-between where he tells you that he just doesn’t know how he feels.
Telling the truth about your own emotions is lovely and liberating, as long as you understand fully that cannot control the outcome.
No matter what Paul says in response, pay attention to what he does. Because sex does not automatically translate into love, you should obser ve whether he wants to spend time with you doing non-sexual things: Walks, talks, coffee dates, watching movies. If he doesn’t choose non-sexual friendship and companionship, you have your answer.
Dear Amy: After my husband’s recent unexpected death, I learned about his longtime af fair with a coworker (conducted while they traveled for work).
I found emails, letters, and enough proof to want to make any spouse beyond angry. I am struggling with dealing with grief and anger at the same time.
Should I tell my adult children about their father, or take this secret with me to the grave?
Dear Angry: You are experiencing the earlier cycles of grief, compounded by your understandable anger regarding your husband’s af fair.
You see this as an either/ or: Tell, or take this secret to the grave.
However, when you have just experienced a huge loss, the wisest thing to do is to … wait. If possible, you should wait several months to make any huge decisions. What you choose to do during these earlier days will help set the course for the rest of your life.
For now, table your decision about disclosing this to your children. Remember they are grieving, too. I believe you will eventually want to tell them about this, but if you do this later, you will be much more intentional, calmer, and more emotionally available to help your children through their reactions.
I urge you to seek grief counseling. Although hospice organizations offer grief groups, because your grief is complicated by betrayal, you should seek individual counseling. You would definitely benefit from disclosing this to a professional, and sorting through your own feelings of both loss and anger.