Wo­man’s dis­ap­pear­ing act ends four-year re­la­tion­ship

Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK -

DEAR ABBY >> I was “ghosted” by a wo­man I had been in a long-dis­tance re­la­tion­ship with. It lasted four years un­til one day she just never re­sponded again.

We are both par­ents, both 30, so it’s hard for me to un­der­stand how some­one could do this to a per­son you’ve had a his­tory with and claim to love. It seems like a child’s re­ac­tion. I’m find­ing it hard to move past this, be­cause I have no idea what hap­pened.

I feel blind­sided. Could she have been hurt or died? I have no one to con­tact and no way to know. My ques­tion is, how does one go about mov­ing past this, since it wasn’t a typ­i­cal breakup? I would re­ally ap­pre­ci­ate your thoughts.

— Can’t go for­ward

DEAR CAN’T GO >> What the per­son did was cow­ardly, but I’m sorry to say it isn’t that un­usual these days. What IS un­usual is that dur­ing the four years you were in a re­la­tion­ship, you never met any of her friends or fam­ily, and have no idea how to con­tact her. Are you ab­so­lutely sure she is who she claimed to be and not a cat­fisher?

I agree that for some­one to do what she did was child­ish. It was also bru­tal, and you may need coun­sel­ing to help you get over it and learn to trust again.

DEAR ABBY >> My ques­tion may seem odd, but your ad­vice would be ap­pre­ci­ated.

I have fam­ily who live in an­other city and have a medium-sized ac­tive dog. I have in­vited them to visit me in my newly built home, which has soft pine floors through­out. I men­tioned to them that I would like to sup­ply dog booties when they visit so their dog’s claws — and the grit that gets caught up be­tween its toes — would not scratch my brand-new floors. We are a fam­ily who has al­ways re­moved our shoes when we en­ter a home.

I have tried invit­ing them nu­mer­ous times over the past two years, but they al­ways have an ex­cuse why they can’t visit. An­other fam­ily mem­ber told me that a com­ment was made that, “If we have to put booties on our dog and they want a show­case home, then it will be empty of us.” Am I be­ing silly and too par­tic­u­lar with my re­quest and thereby caus­ing ill feel­ings within the fam­ily?

— Dog booties in Canada

DEAR DOG BOOTIES >> Your re­quest is nei­ther picky nor “silly.” Af­ter pay­ing top dol­lar for a new floor, I know I cer­tainly wouldn’t want some­body’s pet scratch­ing it up. A con­sid­er­ate guest would ei­ther com­ply or leave the dog at home. If they pre­fer not to ac­cept your in­vi­ta­tion, LET THEM.

DEAR ABBY >> I love to cook for my fam­ily. My grand­daugh­ter has now be­come a ve­gan. It has taken away my en­joy­ment for the fun meals we used to have. I can no longer cook for her, and it has changed the fam­ily dy­nam­ics. How can I cope with this with­out be­ing an­gry? — Sad down South

DEAR SAD >> Al­low me to of­fer two sug­ges­tions. Ei­ther have your grand­daugh­ter bring food with her that she can eat, or widen your reper­toire by learn­ing to pre­pare one ve­gan dish the en­tire fam­ily can en­joy along with her.

Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www. DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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