Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK - Dear Abby

Aries (March 21-April 19): You can’t change peo­ple (if you could, per­haps your home would be a lot cleaner with­out your ef­forts), but you can cer­tainly in­spire them, de­ter them and choose how long to be around them. Tau­rus (April 20-May 20): You put your­self out there, and now you cringe to think of how. It only means that you have guts. Truly, the best out there have had sim­i­lar ex­pe­ri­ences. You’re on your way to be­com­ing a mas­ter. Gem­ini (May 21-June 21): Some­one who is lis­ten­ing to you and track­ing with you on mat­ters of minu­tiae as well as the things that mat­ter most to you: This is not only flat­ter­ing and val­i­dat­ing; it’s prac­ti­cally in­tox­i­cat­ing. Can­cer (June 22-July 22): You care, but you don’t al­ways call. Maybe you’re afraid of get­ting hooked into the sit­u­a­tion and not be­ing able to get out of it. This is a le­git­i­mate fear. De­cide be­fore the in­ter­ac­tion how far you’re will­ing to go with it. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): While man­ag­ing the prac­ti­cal­i­ties of life we some­times min­i­mize the im­por­tance of be­ing able to make oth­ers feel good. Af­ter all, what does the bot­tom line have to do with other peo­ple’s feel­ings? An­swer: ev­ery­thing. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Want­ing is fun. It’s fun all week­end! It’s fun even af­ter you re­al­ize that get­ting what you want won’t bring hap­pi­ness. Oh, well! The chase — now that’s some­thing you’re go­ing to re­mem­ber. Li­bra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): You’re not get­ting the help you once were get­ting — good! You’ve grown to the place where you can han­dle a lot more on your own, and be­cause of this you don’t have to re­port to any­one. Rel­ish the free­dom! Scor­pio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): It’s amaz­ing how peo­ple change the rules to ac­com­mo­date their fas­ci­na­tions and pref­er­ences. Lucky for you, you’ve the pref­er­ence and the fas­ci­na­tion that will lead to fa­vor­able changes. Sagit­tar­ius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): When you’re not sure of your so­cial stand­ing, the thing to do is to host a party. Not only will you dis­cover the so­cial lay of the land but also it will be your plea­sure to put this all to­gether. Capri­corn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): A crit­i­cal mind can be a great gift. Your abil­ity to dis­cern the nec­es­sary bits from the un­nec­es­sary bits will make you more pro­duc­tive, pop­u­lar and ef­fec­tive al­laround. Aquar­ius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): One way is to reach, wan­der and quest un­til you find what you’re look­ing for. It’s not the only way, and this week­end it’s not the best way, ei­ther. If you stay in one place, the world is sure to come to you. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Be­fore you do the heavy lift­ing, phys­i­cally, emo­tion­ally or other­wise, pause to ask your­self if there’s an­other way to float this. Look for el­e­va­tors. Good sense may pre­vent a strain.

To write to Hol­i­day Mathis, visit www.cre­ators.com/au­thor/ hol­i­day-mathis and click “Con­tact.” DEAR ABBY >> I’m a 55-year-old woman, di­vorced for a year and a half. I was mar­ried twice be­fore and have three grown chil­dren.

I own my own home, have a job I en­joy and a lov­ing fam­ily. I do what I want when I want and how I want. I con­trol the re­mote, the ther­mo­stat and my money. I have no de­sire for male com­pan­ion­ship or a “so­cial life,” and can hon­estly say I have never felt hap­pier or more con­tent in my life. I won­der why so­ci­ety places so much em­pha­sis on men and women form­ing ro­man­tic re­la­tion­ships. I also won­der how much angst I could’ve saved my­self, my for­mer hus­bands and my chil­dren by re­al­iz­ing years ago that mar­riage is not for me. I don’t know why it took me so long to re­al­ize that I will never meet a man whose com­pany I en­joy more than my own.

I just want to tell your readers — at least any who feel the same way I do — to be happy with them­selves and stop let­ting friends, rel­a­tives or so­ci­ety dic­tate to them how to feel or what to do. There’s noth­ing wrong with an in­de­pen­dent woman or man be­ing, well, in­de­pen­dent. These days I call my­self ... EMANCIPATED AND HAPPY DEAR EMANCIPATED AND HAPPY >> If I had to guess why so­ci­ety places so much em­pha­sis on mar­riage and romance, it would be be­cause that’s the way so­ci­ety per­pet­u­ates it­self. Af­ter three di­vorces, it is not sur­pris­ing that you are hap­pier on your own.

I’m sure many peo­ple wish they were as in­de­pen­dent and re­silient as you. How­ever, most peo­ple crave some de­gree of close­ness and in­ti­macy — which may be why women and men search for romance. To­day, more than half of adults in the United States are sin­gle. For those who are not “cou­pled up,” I’m sure your mes­sage will be mean­ing­ful.

DEAR ABBY >> I am the lun­cheon chair­per­son for a large fundraiser that will be held in six weeks. I know my ques­tion is one shared by many. How can a bril­liant per­son be ad­vised to keep his re­marks short and not like he’s preach­ing to the choir with­out seem­ing rude?

— Doesn’t want to of­fend

DEAR DOESN’T WANT TO OF­FEND >> Here’s how. Run your event like a com­mand­ing gen­eral. Tell all your speech­mak­ers and hon­orees how much time they are AL­LOT­TED. In­sist they sub­mit their re­marks in enough time be­fore the event that you can re­view the length — and keep “re­mind­ing” the speak­ers what time the event MUST end.

If you bravely and dili­gently do this, your event will be a hit. And YOU will be re­garded as bril­liant be­cause not many peo­ple are coura­geous enough to be this as­sertive.

DEAR ABBY >> What should a per­son do when their chil­dren and grand­chil­dren don’t like to talk on the phone, and text you only?

— Lonely grandma in l.a.

DEAR LONELY GRANDMA >> Learn to text!

Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abi­gail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Con­tact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069.

What teens need to know about sex, drugs, AIDS and get­ting along with peers and par­ents is in “What Ev­ery Teen Should Know.” Send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $7 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Teen Book­let, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.)

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