Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK - Dear Abby

Aries (March 21-April 19): If you’re not into it, don’t do it. If you have to do it, then try to change the way you think about it. Make it about the ac­tion, not about the out­come the ac­tion will bring to you. Taurus (April 20-May 20): Get what you want from a place, and then get out. This is how your gypsy spirit will find sat­is­fac­tion. Keep it mov­ing along; this is free­dom — or some­thing like it. Gemini (May 21-June 21): You’d like to be­lieve that there are a “wise few,” yet the group of­ten gets to­gether and be­haves oth­er­wise. Real lead­er­ship is needed here. Are you up to it? Can­cer (June 22-July 22): Many forces of de­struc­tion are cap­ti­vat­ing, se­duc­tive and beau­ti­ful. This is why you should be­ware of any­thing that crosses your path to­day that falls into the “cap­ti­vat­ing, se­duc­tive and/or beau­ti­ful” cat­e­gory. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Mark Twain’s ad­vice was to eat what you like and let the food fight it out on the in­side. How­ever, to­day, good di­ges­tion will be a se­cret key to your suc­cess. Don’t leave it to chance. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): It’s mighty fine when the game is good enough on its own, but that won’t al­ways be the case. When it’s not, you have to (SET ITAL) be (END ITAL) the fun. What you bring to the ta­ble will make the in­tol­er­a­ble thing tol­er­a­ble. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): Your abil­ity to sus­pend dis­be­lief helps you en­joy sto­ries that are crafted for your en­ter­tain­ment. But when the story is sup­posed to be true, no good can come from ig­nor­ing the glar­ing dis­crep­an­cies. Get to the bot­tom of it. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): You’ll learn from a failed test. It’s bet­ter to fail early and cheaply. Don’t be afraid to mess it up in or­der to see the bound­aries of what you’re deal­ing with. You’ll ap­ply that learn­ing to cre­ate a win­ning strat­egy. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): What is mak­ing it hard for you to de­liver the re­sult you and the others ex­pect? The an­swer to this sim­ple ques­tion, ap­plied well, could lift your mood by 10 points. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You’ll sel­dom find mean­ing in a cake, un­less it’s the pink and green cake that’s melt­ing in the rain in MacArthur Park. Mean­ing is, af­ter all, usu­ally read­ily found in an­noy­ing and un­sat­is­fac­tory things. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Life gets big­ger when you’re braver and con­stricts with fear. Life on the small scale is no bet­ter than an out­size life; it’s just a mat­ter of per­sonal pref­er­ence. Just be sure that you’re choos­ing it and not merely re­act­ing to it. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Gather more in­for­ma­tion and put off judg­ment for as long as pos­si­ble. Maybe this one is not up to you to fig­ure out, and in that case, you’re free to ap­ply your­self in bet­ter places.

To write to Hol­i­day Mathis, visit www.cre­ators.com/ au­thor/hol­i­day-mathis and click “Con­tact.” DEAR ABBY >> Ear­lier this year I moved away from home to move in with my boyfriend. We had been dat­ing for more than a year and were close enough we could see each other when­ever our sched­ules al­lowed. How­ever, over the last few months I have been sec­ond-guess­ing that de­ci­sion. I’m notic­ing things that I re­al­ize won’t work.

To make mat­ters more com­pli­cated, I met a girl who quickly be­came a good friend three months ago. She has in­spired — and in some ways pushed — me to go back to col­lege and im­prove my life. I find my­self fall­ing for her. The thing is, she just started dat­ing some­one, and I would never be­tray my part­ner by be­ing un­faith­ful.

I don’t know what to do. I can see my re­la­tion­ship with my boyfriend is not go­ing to work out, and I know I’m not go­ing to vi­o­late my fe­male friend’s re­la­tion­ship ei­ther. How does some­one end a re­la­tion­ship when they live to­gether? And how do I deal with the fear that I’ll be mis­er­able be­ing on my own again, and the guilt of break­ing my part­ner’s heart? — Mixed-up guy in the Midwest

DEAR MIXED-UP GUY >> The first thing you need to do is rec­og­nize that be­ing un­en­cum­bered can be a pos­i­tive thing, par­tic­u­larly if you are not happy or sat­is­fied with the re­la­tion­ship you are in. The adage “When a door closes, an­other one opens” is usu­ally true.

Start look­ing around for al­ter­na­tive liv­ing ar­range­ments, and when you find some­thing that will work for you, ex­plain to your boyfriend that you need to “make some changes.” It’s bet­ter for both of you than liv­ing a lie.

As to your re­la­tion­ship with the young woman, whether she stays with the per­son she’s dat­ing is some­thing nei­ther of us can pre­dict. When you are sin­gle, she may be­come avail­able. Or, you may meet some­one else and start a re­la­tion­ship. Don’t be afraid. These are the things that make life in­ter­est­ing.

DEAR ABBY >> My hus­band and I have been to­gether six years. This Christ­mas will be our sec­ond year as a mar­ried cou­ple. On Christ­mas morn­ing, my hus­band goes over to his par­ents’ house to open gifts with his sib­lings. They are all adults; the old­est two are al­most 40. (Both are sin­gle.) I’m not in­vited and have never been in­vited to their home, de­spite liv­ing five min­utes away, be­cause his mother is a hoarder.

We are ex­pect­ing our first child in April. My hus­band works in law en­force­ment and is typ­i­cally not off the en­tire day on Christ­mas. He calls me self­ish and ac­cuses me of try­ing to ruin their fam­ily tra­di­tion when I tell him this needs to end. I do not ap­pre­ci­ate my hus­band tak­ing off on me for four hours ev­ery Christ­mas morn­ing. I want us to start our own tra­di­tions. Am I wrong?

— Wants our own tra­di­tions

DEAR WANTS >> Be thank­ful you have never been in­vited to your MIL’s home be­cause from your de­scrip­tion, the ex­pe­ri­ence wouldn’t be pleas­ant.

Since you and your hus­band are start­ing a fam­ily now, I see noth­ing wrong with want­ing to start some tra­di­tions of your own. How­ever, it doesn’t have to be an ei­ther/or sit­u­a­tion. A way to do that with­out caus­ing WWIII would be to sug­gest al­ter­nat­ing the Christ­mas morn­ings he spends at his par­ents’ house, or sched­ule your gift ex­change for a time when your hus­band can be with you. Once the baby ar­rives, hol­i­day plans are bound to change.

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