Aries (March 21-April 19): If you’re not into it, don’t do it. If you have to do it, then try to change the way you think about it. Make it about the action, not about the outcome the action will bring to you. Taurus (April 20-May 20): Get what you want from a place, and then get out. This is how your gypsy spirit will find satisfaction. Keep it moving along; this is freedom — or something like it. Gemini (May 21-June 21): You’d like to believe that there are a “wise few,” yet the group often gets together and behaves otherwise. Real leadership is needed here. Are you up to it? Cancer (June 22-July 22): Many forces of destruction are captivating, seductive and beautiful. This is why you should beware of anything that crosses your path today that falls into the “captivating, seductive and/or beautiful” category. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Mark Twain’s advice was to eat what you like and let the food fight it out on the inside. However, today, good digestion will be a secret key to your success. Don’t leave it to chance. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): It’s mighty fine when the game is good enough on its own, but that won’t always be the case. When it’s not, you have to (SET ITAL) be (END ITAL) the fun. What you bring to the table will make the intolerable thing tolerable. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): Your ability to suspend disbelief helps you enjoy stories that are crafted for your entertainment. But when the story is supposed to be true, no good can come from ignoring the glaring discrepancies. Get to the bottom of it. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): You’ll learn from a failed test. It’s better to fail early and cheaply. Don’t be afraid to mess it up in order to see the boundaries of what you’re dealing with. You’ll apply that learning to create a winning strategy. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): What is making it hard for you to deliver the result you and the others expect? The answer to this simple question, applied well, could lift your mood by 10 points. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You’ll seldom find meaning in a cake, unless it’s the pink and green cake that’s melting in the rain in MacArthur Park. Meaning is, after all, usually readily found in annoying and unsatisfactory things. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Life gets bigger when you’re braver and constricts with fear. Life on the small scale is no better than an outsize life; it’s just a matter of personal preference. Just be sure that you’re choosing it and not merely reacting to it. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Gather more information and put off judgment for as long as possible. Maybe this one is not up to you to figure out, and in that case, you’re free to apply yourself in better places.
To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com/ author/holiday-mathis and click “Contact.” DEAR ABBY >> Earlier this year I moved away from home to move in with my boyfriend. We had been dating for more than a year and were close enough we could see each other whenever our schedules allowed. However, over the last few months I have been second-guessing that decision. I’m noticing things that I realize won’t work.
To make matters more complicated, I met a girl who quickly became a good friend three months ago. She has inspired — and in some ways pushed — me to go back to college and improve my life. I find myself falling for her. The thing is, she just started dating someone, and I would never betray my partner by being unfaithful.
I don’t know what to do. I can see my relationship with my boyfriend is not going to work out, and I know I’m not going to violate my female friend’s relationship either. How does someone end a relationship when they live together? And how do I deal with the fear that I’ll be miserable being on my own again, and the guilt of breaking my partner’s heart? — Mixed-up guy in the Midwest
DEAR MIXED-UP GUY >> The first thing you need to do is recognize that being unencumbered can be a positive thing, particularly if you are not happy or satisfied with the relationship you are in. The adage “When a door closes, another one opens” is usually true.
Start looking around for alternative living arrangements, and when you find something that will work for you, explain to your boyfriend that you need to “make some changes.” It’s better for both of you than living a lie.
As to your relationship with the young woman, whether she stays with the person she’s dating is something neither of us can predict. When you are single, she may become available. Or, you may meet someone else and start a relationship. Don’t be afraid. These are the things that make life interesting.
DEAR ABBY >> My husband and I have been together six years. This Christmas will be our second year as a married couple. On Christmas morning, my husband goes over to his parents’ house to open gifts with his siblings. They are all adults; the oldest two are almost 40. (Both are single.) I’m not invited and have never been invited to their home, despite living five minutes away, because his mother is a hoarder.
We are expecting our first child in April. My husband works in law enforcement and is typically not off the entire day on Christmas. He calls me selfish and accuses me of trying to ruin their family tradition when I tell him this needs to end. I do not appreciate my husband taking off on me for four hours every Christmas morning. I want us to start our own traditions. Am I wrong?
— Wants our own traditions
DEAR WANTS >> Be thankful you have never been invited to your MIL’s home because from your description, the experience wouldn’t be pleasant.
Since you and your husband are starting a family now, I see nothing wrong with wanting to start some traditions of your own. However, it doesn’t have to be an either/or situation. A way to do that without causing WWIII would be to suggest alternating the Christmas mornings he spends at his parents’ house, or schedule your gift exchange for a time when your husband can be with you. Once the baby arrives, holiday plans are bound to change.