Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): You’ve good reason for resisting an idea. You’re probably avoiding potential pain; this is legit. But the pain will be temporary and mild. Consider accepting the fact instead. The more you accept, the more you can change. Taurus (April 20-May 20): It may seem strange, but some people react to stress by portraying the picture of total confidence. Be aware that the one who most seems to have it together may be hurting and in need behind closed doors. Gemini (May 21-June 21): Once upon a time you gave much away, and you did so unflinchingly. Now you wonder why you devalued what you had to offer. Don’t worry; you’ll get another chance, and you’ll do it differently this time. Cancer (June 22-July 22): You need to be able to disagree with your partner without going to war. Furthermore, a strong team needs to know how and when to set aside differences and form a united front. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Guilt serves little purpose now. Your conscience has served you well. The wrongs of the past have been processed, the lessons learned. Let go and accept the grace of your own forgiveness. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Everyone is a piece of work. Luckily, the only piece of work you’re responsible to take on is you. You can try to take on the others, but it’s a guaranteed waste of time. Love and support doesn’t mean doing the work (SET ITAL) for (END ITAL) someone. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): The anticipation of pleasure is exciting and may even turn out to be the best part of an upcoming event. It won’t be the first time that memories of the buildup and preparation overshadow memories of an actual event. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): Someone will be the shaper, and someone will be the shaped. For this reason, it’s important to be around people whose influence is likely to be good, or who will be better off because of your influence over them. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Do not assume that the person who is causing you inconvenience or hurt is doing so willfully. Chances are that this person doesn’t realize the impact he or she is having. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Remind yourself of just how far you’ve come — not to fluff up your ego or fill yourself with pride, but to wake you up to the fact that this challenge in front of you is much like ones you’ve already surmounted. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Many people try to avoid pressure. You’ll use it instead. Temporary tension or discomfort is what motivates you to take your life in an exciting direction. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): There’s a seduction in elegant reasoning and elaborate rationalizations. Resist the allure. Blame and explanation detract from the job at hand: self-reflection, owning up, truth, healing.

To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com/ author/holiday-mathis and click “Contact.” DEAR ABBY » I was divorced three years ago, and recently went on some dating sites to find a possible companion. All the women I met had posted photos that looked nothing like them. It was embarrassing.

You usually meet in a public place, so the gentlemanly thing to do is continue the encounter, only to not follow up. It would be so much nicer if women posted a recent photo/ selfie so that there would be no surprises at the first date.

Case in point: I had a date with a lady whose photo showed her to be slim, with black hair. When she showed up she had white hair and she had gained at least 30 pounds. She recognized me from my profile photo, which was recent. Because I’m a gentleman, I made no mention of the discrepancy and made the most of our lunch.

I think women would be wise to place a recent photo on their profile with the caption, “What you see is what you get.” It would eliminate any surprises.

— Disappointed in Vermont

DEAR DISAPPOINTED » I agree that there should be more truth in advertising, which is why I’m printing your letter. However, the same can be said for men who have also been known to fudge the truth about their height and weight, and whose photos feature them wearing baseball caps to hide their baldness. There will be a better outcome and fewer disappointments if the “moment of truth” comes BEFORE the meeting.

DEAR ABBY » I am very frustrated because my soon-tobe husband doesn’t shower often enough. He showers about twice a month — and that’s it. I have tried convincing him to get in the shower with me as foreplay, but he refuses. When I ask him why he won’t shower, he says he showers “enough.” He doesn’t seem depressed or moody. He just smells really bad — especially “down there.”

All of this is recent. Because he washes so infrequently, I have become less willing to have sexual contact with him. His hygiene problems are major. When we first got together, he showered daily or at least every other day. He doesn’t understand how disgusted I am. His behavior is extremely gross and unhealthy. Help!

— The clean one

DEAR CLEAN ONE » You are absolutely right. Your fiance’s poor hygiene IS extremely gross and unhealthy. He understands how disgusted you are; he just doesn’t care. He cleaned up before because you hadn’t been “wooed and won” yet. He may change in the future, but not for the better.

You say this personality change is recent. You might be doing him a favor to suggest that it’s time for a checkup with his doctor.

DEAR ABBY » What is proper elevator etiquette? I’ve always assumed that passengers should exit the elevator before new ones get on. However, I have seen some people push their way through the door while people are exiting. Shouldn’t they wait until everyone has left the elevator before entering? It seems like common sense to me.

— Ann in New York

DEAR ANN » It IS common sense, and it’s also the rule of etiquette. The people you describe are impatient, ignorant or rude.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.