Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): To honestly and respectfully speak your mind on a regular basis to your close loved ones (without being overly worried about how nice it sounds) is a healthy part of adult relationships. Taurus (April 20-May 20): If you’re being honest, you may admit that you’ve burdened yourself with too many responsibilities: bad for you, bad for your relationships. It will be hard to reassign some of this, but do it before you start feeling resentful. Gemini (May 21-June 21): When you’re in deep, waves of emotion are a ride. You get swept into the swell, rise and rush forward with the force. When you’re not in deep, you’re like a person knee-deep in the ocean. The wave could rudely knock you down. Cancer (June 22-July 22): You are not your feelings. Having this or that kind of feeling doesn’t make you this or that kind of person. While you experience a feeling, there’s a core part of you that is a witness to your experience of it. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): If you think you know what it was and what it is, you might be right. But you won’t know for sure until you step back, open your imagination and ask, “What it be?” Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): This weekend features either a big project or a massive one. Regardless of the scale, everything that comes together will be the result of a series of small action steps. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): Today is like a rope game. Hold on when it’s tugging and you might get burned. You can’t always decide beforehand when you’ll let go. Trust yourself. You’ll probably feel it when the moment is right. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): The benefits of an exciting hobby cannot be underestimated in the weeks to come. To cultivate such an interest will turn up your joy and vitality, not to mention enhance your image. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Someone has to lay down the law, and it will probably be you. You won’t mind playing bad cop to another person’s good cop as the means to an end. You do this in the name of keeping the peace. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): When someone keeps reaching out to you even though you’re not reaching back, there’s a motive to examine. Is it love? Profit? Are you somehow a key to their personal narrative? It’s worth analyzing now. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You are generous, but don’t be too quick to share all you know. Those who haven’t paid their dues yet won’t know what to do with all the information. Only those who have worked hard to get to a certain level will understand. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): While it’s best to avoid conflict today, don’t mistake that for avoiding life. It would be wrong to assume that your honest feelings, thoughts and drives will automatically cause a problem.

To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com/author/ holiday-mathis and click “Contact.” DEAR ABBY » I need your advice. I am 41 years old and was adopted at birth. I was raised by an unloving woman who was emotionally, verbally and physically abusive. I persevered, worked hard, and now have a loving husband and a beautiful son. We live a comfortable and peaceful life.

My adoptive mother, on the other hand, expects me to hand her financial support every month and pay for her extravagant lifestyle. She did not save for herself, as I was her “investment.” She doesn’t ask, Abby; she demands. She believes that if not for her “taking me away from the slums as a child,” I wouldn’t be where I am in life now.

The financial burden she has guilted me into is putting a strain on my marriage and our plans to save for a stable future. I am depressed beyond words. It doesn’t help that I still carry resentment for having been severely mistreated as a child.

Her words are vile whenever she doesn’t get “her” money, and she couldn’t care less about me or my son. I have no love for her. But I do feel for her in her old age. Please help. What should I do? — Strained relationship in

California

DEAR STRAINED RELATIONSHIP » Here’s what to do. Realize that when good parents adopt a baby, they do it NOT because of what that baby will do for them, but for what they can give to that child. Then tell your abuser the gravy train has stopped, she won’t be getting another penny and cut off all communication.

You do not “owe” her anything, so do not allow yourself to be bullied or guilted into being her ATM machine. If you feel the urge to waver, take my advice and spend the money on a licensed psychotherapist who will help you understand that your adoptive mother does not have the ethical or moral right to anything more from you than you have already given.

DEAR ABBY » I have a 6-year-old daughter and a 3-year-old son who have no modesty at all. I don’t make a big deal about private parts. They sometimes bathe together and will jump in the shower with me or my husband. Because of this, they’ll get into our pool or hot tub naked if there isn’t a swimsuit around. Our backyard is completely private. No one can see in, so I have no problem with it.

However, when my inlaws are in town, they are appalled and turn it into a big deal. Then my husband freaks out, scolds the kids and makes them put their clothes on.

First of all, they are OUR children and WE are raising them. Second, if my husband didn’t want them swimming or running around the house naked, then the kids should have been told before their grandparents arrived. I would understand that if the kids were older, it might be inappropriate, but they are still so young.

Am I too laid-back, or are my in-laws too uptight and we should just let the kids be kids and have fun?

— Unashamed in Florida

DEAR UNASHAMED » You are not too laid-back, and your inlaws may not be too uptight. The difference in your attitudes regarding nudity may be a result of the generation gap. I do think it’s hypocritical of your husband to reprimand the children for doing something that’s usually acceptable, because it sends a confusing message. He should explain to the kids that when “company” comes, they will need to cover up so they don’t make the guests uncomfortable.