Daily Local News (West Chester, PA)
Roses honor the memory of their daughter
The Coatesville Flower Shop owners will hand out a dozen roses for free to each visitor to give to those who “need a smile”
COATESVILLE » In handing out a dozen free roses as a way of healing from their pain, the DePedro family wants to tell parents who have lost a child that “it does get better.”
Dorrie and Greg DePedro, Coatesville Flower Shop owners, are often asked where they came up with the idea of “Lisa’s Roses” and they tell them her legacy is to “do something nice for someone today.” But they ask again how that started.
“Then we take a walk back in time that often starts as a painful memory, but ends bringing joy to our hearts,” Greg DePedro said. His late daughter Lisa was diagnosed with cancer in March 2004.
“It was a very devastating time for her and for all of us,” Greg DePedro said. “And then it began – the outpouring of love and support from the commu- nity, from her church, from our granddaughter’s school family.”
They were there for Lisa, for her daughter Payton and for the DePedros in every capacity. He recalled that people cooked her meals, cleaned her house, mowed her grass, took her to doctor appointments, helped Payton with her homework after school and took her to school functions that Lisa couldn’t attend. And they prayed.
“Groups of people would come together and pray for her,” Greg DePedro said. “The love and support became more than we ever expected. They just kept giving and giving. They would call us and say ‘what can we do?’ We want to help.”
When her parents told Lisa that people wanted to help but didn’t know how, Lisa suggested that they would do “something nice for someone else. That is something special that they can do for me.”
Lisa died on Aug. 23, 2004, five months after she was diagnosed. Doing a nice gesture for someone became a tribute to Lisa after her parents discussed what to do on the first anniversary of Lisa’s death. At one point they thought about closing the store for the day.
“We could either bury our hearts and stay home or do something to honor our daughter’s memory,” Greg DePedro said. “So we decided we would ask people to come to the Flower Shop. We would give them one dozen roses for free.”
The only stipulation was that they keep one for themselves and give the other 11 to different people who need a smile.
“We weren’t sure that first year what to expect. We didn’t even know if anyone would come,” Greg DePedro said. “Well, they did. They came from all over the state to participate in ‘Lisa’s Roses.’”
Greg DePedro said that the giving of the roses over the past 13 years has brought joy to people, including him and his wife. The giveaway helps keep Lisa’s memory alive when patrons visit the flower shop at 259 Lincoln Highway on Aug. 23 to participate. Since last year, the giveaway now serves a way of healing for other parents who have also lost a child.
“We invited them to come and share in our day and give roses out in their child’s name,” Greg DePedro said. “Sometimes just saying your child’s name out loud brings a type of peace to your heart.”
Greg DePedro said one mother
who he asked to stay to give out roses in her child’s name told him she would try to stay for a few minutes, but she questioned how she would handle it emotionally. Six hours later, he noticed she still handed out roses and she found a smile. Parents are openly invited again this year.
“It’s time for us to help them heal,” Greg DePedro said, “as so many have helped us.”
“The hardest thing we
have to tell moms and dads is that it does get better,” Greg DePedro said. “You might not feel fantastic, but you will feel better with time and prayers.”
Payton Helm, Lisa’s daughter, was 8 going on 9 when she lost her mom. Now 23, she has helped out at the shop for several years and became involved four years ago with the prep work for the giveaway by cleaning the roses and helping to order 10,000 roses.
“It’s one of those things that started out as a way for us to feel better about the day instead of being sad, to make something good of it,”
Helm said. “The center of it isn’t on us anymore. It’s helping others feel better who have lost loved ones.”
Greg DePedro added that they had been concentrating on their daughter’s life and now it’s also about helping others parents. Visitors are encouraged to write their child’s name on the prayer board and they can even post a photograph of them.