Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): Traditions are, by definition, historical. Yet with the world rolling ever forward, you have the option of carrying them into the future or leaving them behind. What traditions do you want to keep as you roll right along with it? Taurus (April 20-May 20): There are things that are clearly not going to work out no matter how much effort goes into them. Put those in the “won’t” pile, not the “can’t” pile. Let’s not infantilize ourselves by saying that we can’t. Gemini (May 21-June 21): You’ll steer clear of potentially addictive games and products that you don’t want to need. What helps is that you’ve got plenty else going on. With your full agenda, there will be little room for such things to seduce you. Cancer (June 22-July 22): It would seem that you choose whom you want to choose, yet what’s actually going on is that you’re limited to the options you see in your immediate environment. So how free really is your choice? Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Today’s happiness depends on what you’re willing to do to achieve it. Are you willing to adjust your expectation? Change the plan? Change your role? Think of things differently? Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): There are way more wonders in the world than the official seven. Because of your increased curiosity and awareness of the world, you’ll note more than one in your immediate environment before the sun goes down on the day. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): Get out your metaphoric broom. The old things need to go away so you have room for the new things to come into your realm. (Actually, what’s needed may be more akin to a metaphoric moving crew plus truck.) Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): There are some things you can leave to chance that will have better results than if you hadn’t. And then there are things that really must be commandeered. Knowing the difference — that’s your cosmic gift today. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You’re powerful, partly because it’s not your goal to be. Your whole aim is to take care of those who need you. It turns out that the goal is enough to make you bigger and stronger by the day. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The gentle stirring of the trees isn’t much, but it’s an indicator of the magnificent storm that’s coming. Pay attention to the metaphoric representation of this in your life today. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Any fool can cheat when dealt a bad hand of cards. It’s more important to play fairly when you have a winning hand. Hold yourself to higher standards in regard to those areas in which you find yourself advantaged. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): You’ve already formed an opinion about it. There aren’t so many who have! Therefore, if someone else seconds that opinion, you’ll not only agree but also consider that person to be a sort of kindred.

To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com/ author/holiday-mathis and click “Contact.” DEAR ABBY » I am at that age when most of my friends and colleagues are having children. I suffered a miscarriage (my first pregnancy) a few months ago, and I have been feeling depressed and helpless about the situation.

We are seeing a fertility specialist, so I am positive about our chances. However, when my husband and I are invited to attend functions with friends, I have been declining because one of his friends recently announced her pregnancy. I have become extremely withdrawn, jealous and anti-social. Is it normal for me to feel this way? I would love to be sociable and happy, but it’s hard.

— Baby jealous in Maryland

DEAR BABY JEALOUS » It’s normal to feel some jealousy when those around you seem to experience something easily that you are struggling with. However, to isolate yourself because of it is self-defeating.

It could help you to talk this through with a licensed therapist. You are not alone in having these feelings, and the therapist can give you tools to help you cope. Ask your fertility specialist for a referral. I’m sure you won’t be the first patient to do that, and it might bring you comfort.

DEAR ABBY » My issue is related to celebrations with my in-laws. They are both retired.

At holiday time, we suggest that we pick up something to eat on the way, but they always tell us they already have stuff ready to cook. The problem is, we have gotten food poisoning in their home twice because of undercooked chicken. We have a 16-month-old son, and my inlaws are offended because we won’t let him eat from their table and always bring his own food.

After the first bout, my husband asked them if they had a food thermometer. They said they did not, so we bought one for them. The second time — on Easter — was horrible.

My husband doesn’t want to say anything to them because they are good to us and generous to our son. But I can’t see myself ever eating at their house again. Help, please. What do we say to them?

— Grateful, but ...

DEAR G.B. » What you say is that you and their son have gotten food poisoning twice at their house because of undercooked chicken. Twice is enough. From now on, invite them to YOUR home for holiday dinners.

DEAR ABBY » I’ve been married for more than 50 years to a man I love with my whole being. But for years I’ve heard people say about their spouse, “I love him dearly, but I am not IN LOVE with him.”

Would you please explain what this means? What’s the difference?

— Just gotta ask in Arizona

DEAR JUST GOTTA » I think the phrase means different things to different people. To some it indicates that the excitement, those “fires of passion,” may have cooled to a simmer and been slowly replaced by a calmer and deeper kind of affection. To others it may mean they weren’t deeply in love in the first place.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more sociable person, order “How to Be Popular.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 610540447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)