Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): The first rule of professionalism is not to ask others to do your work. The second rule is to adhere to the training manual. If you weren’t trained, it’s not your fault, but the true professional finds a way to get trained nonetheless. Taurus (April 20-May 20): You agreed. You checked the box. That box included limitations that you will definitely outgrow and push against in time — as well as limitations that you are better off respecting. Knowing the difference, that’s the thing. Gemini (May 21-June 21): As you mix into the crowd, you’ll be with all manner and types of people, most melding with your goodwill and positive intention; some, not so much. Just remember that all rudeness is essentially weakness or ignorance. Cancer (June 22-July 22): You’re not looking to blame anyone, though neither would you mind if someone else would step in and take responsibility for what’s going on. It could actually happen... miracle of miracles! Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Avoid matters of religion and politics in polite company. Extend the taboo-topics list to finance, health, fashion, taste preferences in general and basically anything that highlights differences of opinion, ideology or belief. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You’ve trepidation about tackling the events of the day, but that won’t stop you. The upside of being afraid is an adrenaline rush — just what you need to take courage in the face of fear. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): You’ll use the past to reference where you are. That’s the proper use of it, after all. To use it as a refuge would make you smaller. To use it as your glory would deny the excitement that is to come. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): Some say it isn’t right to change the goal. Some say it signals weakness or failure. But not all goals are worthy. A worthy goal is the water that raises all ships. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Your success today will depend on your ability to compartmentalize and manage your emotions, including the very subtle, almost non-emotion of boredom. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): It’s not that everyone wants or needs to be included in the shenanigans; it’s just that everyone wants to feel invited. Handle the invites in a highly inclusive manner and you’ll be a social success. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): There’s something new on the horizon that will not fully rise if not for your input. You can’t imagine how important you are to this right now, but hopefully you won’t doubt it, either. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Shakespeare suggested, “Better three hours too soon than a minute too late.” In his time, three hours (without a cellphone!) must have been excruciating. However, he has a point. And you’ll earn many points for a timely arrival.

To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators.com/ author/holiday-mathis and click “Contact.” DEAR ABBY » After 16 months of casual dating, I married my ex-wife. We met through Facebook. Unfortunately, we couldn’t make the marriage work, and after two years we divorced.

That was two years ago. It was my first marriage and her second. I was angry that we couldn’t make it work, and I blamed her for it. I felt hate and disgust for her and blocked her out of my life.

One night I was bored and decided to go back through all my old Facebook posts. When I reached the year my ex and I began talking and reread the posts from after we were married, I realized that it was my fault our marriage failed. My ex-wife loved me so much you could feel it through her posts to me, but I didn’t reciprocate that love. I feel horrible that I didn’t recognize it during our time together.

She has since moved on and is getting married next year. I want her to know how sorry I am for giving up on us and apologize for all the hateful things I said about her. My feelings have nothing to do with her moving on. I am truly happy for her.

Should I tell her how sorry I am, or must I continue to live with the shame I feel? It’s tearing me up, but I think it may be best to leave her alone.

— It was my fault

DEAR MY FAULT » I don’t think it is ever too late to offer an apology. You and your ex have both grown since the divorce, albeit in opposite directions. Write her a letter, tell her you are sorry and wish her well. It’s the right thing to do, but do not expect absolution.

DEAR ABBY » A few years ago, my two BFFs had milestone birthdays within a few weeks of each other. Wanting to do something special, I splurged for a weekend in Vegas for the three of us. I bought first-class plane tickets, high-end hotel rooms, spa appointments, the best seats at a show, and paid for all our meals — including dinner at an expensive steak house. While I could afford it, the weekend cost me several thousand dollars.

Fast-forward a couple of years to MY milestone birthday. One of them sent me a card, and they split the tab for my lunch at a fast-food restaurant. There were promises of something more special to come. While I didn’t expect the extravagant experience I gave them (our financial situations are different), I thought they might plan lunch or dinner at a nice restaurant. Since then, nothing more has been said or done.

This was a couple of years ago, and I still can’t let go of my hurt and disappointment. We’ve been friends for more than 20 years, but I’m thinking of ending the relationships. Every time I see them, I wonder if our friendship is one-sided. How can I get past this?

— Disappointed in Dallas

DEAR DISAPPOINTED » Your mistake was going over the top with their birthday splurges. When you do something nice for someone, you shouldn’t EXPECT reciprocation. Concentrate on the positive aspects of your relationship with them, and let the rest go.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

Good advice for everyone — teens to seniors — is in “The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It.” To order, send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)