Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): Things are working, so let them. New methods will develop soon enough; there’s really no reason to rush things. Don’t get the update just because it’s available. Get it when you need it. Taurus (April 20-May 20): They say, “Stop,” and you leap forward. They say, “Jump,” and you sit down. It’s odd how you feel like doing the opposite of what’s expected of you, but you’re also honoring a contrarian voice inside you with its own good reasons for being. Gemini (May 21-June 21): Your process won’t require a lot of seriousness and commitment. Lighten up, and get playful. You’re allowed to be like a child following the trends and whims of youth. Life is an experiment. Cancer (June 22-July 22): You don’t show your true emotions to just anyone. That’s what makes it so special when you finally do open up with honesty about how you’re feeling. Only do so with those who can be trusted with your tender heart. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): Giving is different from selling. Selling is an exchange with expectations and rules that need to be upheld. Giving shouldn’t be this way. Give without conditions. It’s the way your gift will do the most good. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The situation will require you to simmer down, settle your energy into the same tone as the environment and get on with the business of fitting in. This will be a lot more fun than it sounds. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): There will be a time for getting hard on yourself and pushing yourself through to the next level. This isn’t it. This is the time to ease up and celebrate the many things you’ve already done right. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): You can come up with a plan that will help the most people with the least effort and complication. Brilliant! Then, with a calm sense of purpose, you will move everyone toward a common goal. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Remember when you let someone into your world and heart a little too soon? What followed was regret and a whole new set of rules for entry — rules to stand by today. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your aim will be to surprise and delight the public. This cannot be accomplished through doing what they expect and delivering what they’ve already seen. Bonus: the unique satisfaction of raised eyebrows and the sound of laughter. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Somewhere between your high aspirations and the current demands of your daily life is a wonderful fantasyland. It’s a playground, a vision board, an escape route. It’s a good place, a place where things get done. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): There’s little to stop you from winning the admiration of your peers and the good opinion of your superiors. In the future, this approval will translate into financial abundance. DEAR ABBY » I’m 18 and was best friends with “Sam” for two years until we started dating 10 months ago. It has been so much fun. He is the first person I have truly loved.

When we first started dating we weren’t exclusive, and he hooked up with my best friend. We all go to school together and see each other every day. Since then, I’m uncomfortable being around her.

I have expressed my feelings to Sam, but there’s nothing we can do. I often feel hot and cold about our relationship and get close to breaking up with him. I have considered therapy, but my family can’t afford it. What can I do so I don’t hurt myself and him?

— Hurting in California

DEAR HURTING » You didn’t mention what you and this young man plan to do in the fall, but if it involves continuing your education, your paths may diverge at that time. In the meantime, you and Sam should be free to see others because, if your emotional needs were being met, you wouldn’t be blowing hot and cold about the relationship.

DEAR ABBY » I started sucking my thumb when I was 1. My parents tried for years to break my bad habit, but it wasn’t until I started going to slumber parties at 16 that I stopped.

I am now 27, and a few months ago I woke up with my thumb in my mouth. Since then I have caught myself sucking my thumb in the middle of the night. It seems to happen when I’m really tired.

I am now in a committed relationship and would die of embarrassment if my boyfriend saw me doing it. How can I stop once and for all? — Wet thumb in the South

DEAR W.T. » I have heard from other adults who suck their thumbs, so comfort yourself with the thought that it’s not all that unusual.

One way to fix the problem would be to not allow yourself to get overly tired. Another would be to coat your thumbs with a bitter or badtasting substance at bedtime. (Some people find the taste of nail polish deters them from thumb-sucking.) You could also apply hand cream and wear cotton gloves to bed. However, if that doesn’t do the trick, simply level with your boyfriend and ask him if it’s a deal-breaker.

P.S. You were able to quit the habit for 11 years. Something triggered your return to it. Consider keeping a journal to identify what is going on before your thumb-sucking episodes so you can gain insight into what may be causing them.

DEAR ABBY » I haven’t been in a relationship since 1995. Is it true when they say, “Use it or lose it,” and does it hold true for women also?

— Wants to know in Indiana

DEAR WANTS TO KNOW » I think the answer to your question may depend upon what “it” is.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

Abby shares more than 100 of her favorite recipes in two booklets: “Abby’s Favorite Recipes” and “More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $14 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Shipping and handling are included in the price.)