Horoscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19): The beautiful thing will be a simple thing. But there’s a process to finding this. Along the way, things will get mighty complicated indeed, which will be your cue to go back to the basics and start again. Taurus (April 20-May 20): Where do you draw the line with your mischief? Too far to one side and it’s criminal. Too far to the other and it’s such a weak strain it could hardly be considered mischief at all. You’ll employ your best judgment and hit the perfect tone. Gemini (May 21-June 21): When you hear what you don’t like, how do you punish the messenger? People only lie because the truth seems too dangerous a thing to tell. The way to get to the truth is to make it safer for people to tell it to you. Cancer (June 22-July 22): Relationships are always a co-creation. It may seem that you’re responsible for what happens in them, but only partly. Consider carefully the various motives at play in today’s matters of love and friendship. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): As a Leo, you understand that the king isn’t the king because he’s better; he’s the king because his position got him crowned. Doing good work from where you are, wherever you may be, is the aim that serves you best. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Of course nothing is certain, but who wants to live with that ethos? It’s not very productive and even less exciting. Anyway, some things are more certain than others. Choose one and go for it. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): “Face your fear” is the common advice. Putting your face into fear’s face isn’t always required to solve the problem; it can be solved through action. Today you could do the action blindfolded and have the same result. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): A 1 percent improvement will have a 360-degree effect. What makes you better in your personal life will make you better at everything: work, business, art, parenting, friendship, self-care and on and on. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Your signmate former British Prime Minister Winston Churchill suggested, “Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.” But if you can separate the monkey from the organ grinder, you’ll get a good story from each. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): While there are times when a passively experienced amusement is just what you need to relax, the best entertainment for today is the sort that engages your brain at a high level. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You’d like to do more with less, and indeed you’ll feel happier, lighter and more productive when this happens. The first step is getting to less, though. So what three things can you let go of? Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): You’ve been good at doing you for years now, and yet there are still people who think they have the answer to how you could be doing it better. Steer them off the pursuit, either gently or abruptly, because they’re wrong. DEAR ABBY >> I have been with my husband for five years, and we have two children together. It’s my husband’s second marriage and my first. He and his first wife, “Gretchen,” had no kids, but they did have a long and messy divorce. She and her family live in the same small town as we do. Her favorite pastime is telling anyone who will listen that my husband physically abused and raped her.

I know my husband. In our five years together he has never so much as raised his voice to me or our children. I don’t presume to know what happened between him and Gretchen during their marriage, but I know in my heart it never got physical. I have spent five years listening to this garbage and hearing her put him down and say nasty things about me. I have reached my limit. Should I confront her or just keep refusing to acknowledge her?

— Drama with his ex

DEAR DRAMA >> You know that what your husband’s ex is saying isn’t true because you have been with your husband long enough to see the kind of person he is. Continue to ignore and avoid her. If someone repeats her stories, tell them that IN YOUR EXPERIENCE what she’s saying couldn’t be further from the truth. People who know you will understand what Gretchen’s saying for what it is — unhappiness and vindictiveness.

DEAR ABBY >> I’m at a loss and need some outside advice. I’m a man, married for two years. My husband and I have a great marriage, but last week my father was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and I’m having trouble processing it. My husband is super supportive and has had my back 100 percent. But yesterday I woke up and a friend of mine wanted to meet with me and we ended up having sex.

What’s wrong with me? I have never cheated before. I have been cheated on in the past, and I know how much it hurt, so I vowed never to do it. But it just happened. I regret what I did, and I feel gross. Why would I do this? Is it my way of coping with Dad’s illness? I need to understand what the hell happened. Please help. — Off the rails

DEAR OFF >> I, too, suspect that your infidelity may be related to trying to deal with your father’s diagnosis. It is not as unusual as you may think for people to react to grief, trauma or death by doing something uncharacteristic. However, if this becomes your default coping mechanism, discuss it with a licensed psychotherapist so it doesn’t destroy your marriage.

P.S. Unplanned sexual encounters can have unplanned consequences. To make sure this one hasn’t, contact your doctor about being checked for an STD. And consider coming clean to your husband, because it would be disastrous if your friend let the truth slip out accidentally. (And, of course, if you’ve developed an STD, tell your husband right away.)

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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