Friend upset after being left out of vacation plans
Recently, my oldest and dearest friend (since kindergarten) talked about renting a house in Puerto Rico for her family and mine. We talk often and have remained close over the years. I consider her family a part of my family.
She recently informed me that she went ahead and booked the trip with her sister-in-law, her nephews and her parents without saying a word to me about it. I was extremely hurt, and when I told her so, her answer was, “Well, I didn't make the arrangements; my sister-in-law did. There will be small children, and I know you don't want to do that.” (I had told her previously that when my husband and I go on vacation, we prefer adult-only resorts.) I'm disappointed and angry. Should I end our friendship, or just let it go?
— Excluded In New York
If this is the first time something like this has happened, let it go. If it continues to happen, and I doubt it will, reevaluate the friendship then.
My husband passed away seven years ago. My oldest son, “Danny,” is 29 and is getting married. He has one brother, “Adam,” who is 19, and they have always gotten along. I'm really upset that Adam wasn't asked to be in the wedding party, at least as a groomsman.
I'm sure my husband, if he were alive, would have had a talk with Danny about this — especially because ALL FOUR of my husband's brothers were in our wedding party as well as his best friend. I'm upset that I have to bring it to Danny's attention, but I need to address this without making him mad.
What's your opinion?
— Matter Of
Scruples
Scruples may have less to do with this than budget restrictions or Adam's young age may have. By all means, mention this to Danny but, after that, refrain from meddling. Your wedding was yours; this one is Danny's and his fiancee's.
My son (my only child) lives with his fiancee. His marriage, which produced my oldest grandson, has finally ended. He has two boys with the fiancee. She and I have never seen eye-to-eye. When my son and I argue, she prevents me from seeing my grandsons. It makes it very difficult for me to bond with them, for fear she will keep them away forever. What should I do? I'm actually holding back my emotions because I'm scared.
— On Eggshells In
Washington
If you and your son have a functional relationship (aside from the occasional disagreement), take this up with him, and be frank about it. His fiancee should not use the children to punish you. However, if your son won't put a stop to what she's doing, then it makes sense to protect your emotions — and to not feel guilty about doing it. If that means guarding them where your son's children are concerned, that would be the healthier course of action.
The SoCal Indie Bestseller List for the sales week ended June 19 is based on reporting from the independent booksellers of Southern California, the California Independent Booksellers Alliance and IndieBound. For an independent bookstore near you, visit IndieBound.org.
HARDCOVER FICTION
1. The Twilight World: Werner Herzog
2. Two Nights in Lisbon: Chris Pavone
3. Horse: Geraldine Brooks
4. Cult Classic: Sloane Crosley
5. Time Is a Mother: Ocean Vuong
6. Sparring Partners: John Grisham
7. The Hotel Nantucket: Elin Hilderbrand
8. The Candy House: Jennifer Egan
9. Lessons in Chemistry: Bonnie Garmus
10. This Time Tomorrow: Emma Straub
HARDCOVER NONFICTION
1. Happy-Go-Lucky: David Sedaris
2. Crying in H Mart: A Memoir: Michelle Zauner
3. Rough Draft: A Memoir: Katy Tur
4. Get Out of My Head: Creating Modern Clarity with Stoic Wisdom: M. Andrew McConnell
Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience:
6. Bad Mexicans: Race, Empire, and Revolution in the Borderlands: Kelly Lytle
7. River of the Gods: Genius, Courage, and Betrayal in the Search for the Source of the Nile: Candice Millard
8. I'd Like to Play Alone, Please: Essays: Tom Segura
9. Taste: My Life Through Food: Stanley Tucci
10. Killing the Killers: The Secret War Against Terrorists: Bill O'Reilly, Martin Dugard
MASS MARKET
1. 1984: George Orwell
2. Animal Farm: George Orwell
3. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Douglas Adams
4. The Diary of a Young Girl: Anne Frank
5. Flowers for Algernon:
6. Carrie:
Stephen King
7. American Gods: Gaiman
8. The Black Ice: Michael Connelly
9. The Illustrated Man: Ray Bradbury
10. The Ocean at the End of the Lane: Neil Gaiman
TRADE PAPERBACK FICTION
1. Book Lovers: Emily Henry
2. The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo: Taylor Jenkins Reid
3. The Song of Achilles: Madeline Miller
4. Beautiful World, Where Are You?: Sally Rooney
5. Circe: Madeline Miller
6. Where the Crawdads Sing: Delia Owens
7. It Ends With Us: Colleen Hoover
8. Pachinko: Min Jin Lee
9. The Personal Librarian: Marie Benedict, Victoria Christopher Murray
10. Beach Read: Emily Henry
Moon Alert: There are no restrictions to shopping or important decisions today. The Moon is in Gemini.
Happy birthday for Sunday, June 26, 2022: You are a creative, intelligent, interesting conversationalist. You enjoy the company of others and like to be informed.
You are hard-working and romantic. This year is slower paced. Your focus is mostly on relationships and partnerships. Look for relationships that benefit you. Take time for yourself.
Aries (March 21-April 19): \*\*\*\*\* Enjoy talking to neighbors, relatives, siblings and daily contacts, because this is an upbeat, friendly day! It's a perfect day for a short trip, and a great day to network. Writers, actors and salespeople also will flourish. (It's a wonderful day to write romantic fiction.) Tonight: Communicate.
Taurus (April 20-May 20): \*\*\*\* Business and commerce are favored today.
Look for ways to boost your income or get a better paying job. Work-related travel is also likely. However, you also might spend money on lovely exciting things! Tonight: Check your assets.
Gemini (May 21-June 20): \*\*\*\*\* This is a feelgood day because the Moon is in your sign lined up with fair Venus and dancing with lucky Jupiter. (It doesn't get much better than this.) In particular, it's a lovely day for romance! Enjoy! Tonight: This is your hour.
Cancer (June 21-July
22): \*\*\*\* This is truly a marvelous day! (You have a warm feeling in your tummy.) Ironically, you will enjoy time alone, especially swinging in a hammock, or you will enjoy the company of others. It's your choice. Work done alone or behind the scenes will boost your reputation and good name. Tonight: Pamper yourself.
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): \*\*\*\*\* Enjoy warm friendships and schmoozing with others today, because people will be glad to see you. This is a great date day. It's also a wonderful day to enjoy the company of creative, artistic types. Make plans with someone to explore future travel or exciting ideas. Tonight: Socialize!
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): \*\*\*\* It's a great day for a romantic get-together. You will impress someone! Someone might want your advice about how to make something look better. (Something also might boost shared wealth today.) Tonight: Take a bow.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): \*\*\*\*\* This is a glorious day to travel or do anything out of the ordinary. If you can't travel, talk to people from other cultures. In fact, you might fall in love with someone or develop a crush on someone “different.” Tonight: Explore!
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov.
21): \*\*\*\* This is a good money day. It's an excellent time to discuss how to divide something, perhaps an inheritance or something to do with jointly held property. Whatever happens, you'll come out smelling like a rose! This is also a passionate, affectionate day for romance. Tonight: Strong affection. Sagittarius (Nov. 22Dec. 21): \*\*\*\*\* Enjoy schmoozing with others today, because this is a romantic, friendly day. You will also like to meet members of the general public. Enjoy social outings, sports events and fun times! Tonight: Listen. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): \*\*\*\* This is a positive day at work. Co-workers will be supportive. Workrelated travel will please you. Even if you have to work on behalf of someone else or perform a service, you will find it rewarding and satisfying. Tonight: Tidy up details.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb.
18): \*\*\*\*\* This is a fun-loving day! Enjoy playful activities with children, social outings, the entertainment world, the arts and fun diversions. Have a long lunch. Go for a picnic. Enjoy the company of your kids. There are so many options to please you today! Do something. Tonight: Play!
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): \*\*\*\* Home and family will be a source of happiness. This is a lovely day to entertain at home. Invite the gang over for good food and drink! Likewise, today is favorable for real-estate negotiations. Tonight: Relax at home.