Teenage daughter won’t wear her coat

Dear Harriette: My teenage daughter absolutely refuses to wear a coat. It is getting cold outside where we live in the Northeast. I bought her several coats that are popular for her age group, but she will not put on any of them. I noticed that she might wear it out the door, but literally the minute she goes outside she puts it in her bag. How can I allow her to be a teenager and become independent while staying warm? I’m really not the overbearing type, but when it goes below 30 degrees, you need to wear a coat! — Put It On

Dear Put It On: I went through the same thing when my daughter was 15. It was frustrating, to be sure. We came up with a couple of solutions that may work for you. Start with layers.

Suggest that she wear two or three layers of clothing — including some version of an undershirt or camisole, a long-sleeved top and a sweatshirt. A beefy sweatshirt can be perfect for keeping the body warm. You may also want her to pick out a jacket that she can wear over her sweatshirt.

This is not a coat. Moreover, it can be a puffer jacket that is lightweight and very warm at once.

Dear Harriette: A good friend at work asked me to vouch for her in a discrimination lawsuit. The only problem is that I signed a nondisclosure agreement that says that I cannot reveal anything about what I know about the company unless I want to be sued. I love my friend and want to help her, but I don’t know what I can do. She is mad at me because she thinks I’m a sellout. She knows that the NDA is part of every staffer’s agreement when you join the company. I feel bad for her.

Some people did treat her wrong — at least from what she told me. But I don’t see how I can be of help. Apparently, nobody is talking. It’s probably for the same reason. I guess my company must have had issues before because they aren’t playing. On your first day, you have to sign this agreement. Do I have any wiggle room? — NDA

Dear NDA: Companies have nondisclosure agreements for a reason. They are legally binding documents that you must consciously sign that say you will not reveal anything private or incriminating about the company you work for, even after you leave. You can check with a lawyer to see if there are any caveats in the document. Legal counsel can pore over it and give you a clear sense of whether you have any space to speak at all. Do not say anything until your lawyer reviews the document that you have signed.

You can and should speak to your friend. Let her know how sorry you are that things are devolving the way that they are. Remind her that you care deeply for her. And point out that your hands are tied because of the NDA that you signed.