Couple has wildly different musical tastes

Dear Harriette: My partner and I do not share musical tastes — at all. In the beginning, I thought it was cute. He would listen to certain things that I had never heard of, and vice versa. We explored each other’s musical tastes a bit early on, but now it’s just annoying. When we are in the car, we have gotten to the point where whoever is driving has complete control over the music. This makes the trip annoying for both of us. What can we do about it? — Bad Music

Dear Bad Music: What types of music do you have in common? Before you say “nothing,” think about it. There is so much music out there, I bet you can find a style of music that appeals to both of you.

Why not suggest that next time you are in the car you switch channels every 15 minutes so that each of you gets to enjoy your own music, but you also get to explore other music choices? Suggest it as a game of sorts.

As you rest on different channels, listen for a while and tell each other what you liked or didn’t like. Doing this will address the elephant in the room and also create fun where there was friction.

Dear Harriette: My older sister works for a company that I’ve always wanted to work for. I’ve had my eye on this company for years — way before she started — and she knows that.

She won’t talk to talent acquisition about me because she fears that it will tarnish her reputation if I do poorly. She doesn’t have much faith in me even though I’m qualified for the position that I want to apply for. How do I get her to help me? — Conflict of Interest

Dear Conflict of Interest:

Your sister has made it clear that she won’t help you, so stop trying to get her to be your advocate. She could be right, for other reasons. It truly could be a conflict of interest for her to recommend you.

If you do get a job there, you will have to reveal that the two of you are related, which could work for or against you. The fact that she will not have been involved in your hire could be helpful, believe it or not.

Do your research. Do you know anyone else who works for the company? Who works in the department where you want to work? Do a cold call to that person and ask for an information interview. Be proactive in meeting and getting to know the people who may be able to open doors for you. Apply for the job even if you don’t make a personal connection. In your cover letter, tell them how long you have wanted to work there and why. Sell yourself, your ideas to help them and your passion for being there.