Longtime south suburban teacher, advocate for women’s rights
Marylyn Carleo Grabosky chaired the English department at Lincoln-Way Central High School in New Lenox for more than two decades, and in retirement was an energetic supporter of nonprofit groups that promote women’s rights.
“In a loud, boastful, over-sensationalized world, Marylyn was a person of astounding competence who quietly, expertly and straightforwardly attended to her life, her business, her causes and her relationships — relishing experiences for her own reasons — without ego, without the need for recognition,” said Tracey Button, a longtime friend.
Grabosky, 81, died of complications from endometrial cancer Dec. 4 at her Near North Side home, said her wife, Laura Desmond. Grabosky also had homes in Grand Beach, Michigan, and Miami Beach, Florida.
Born Marilyn Custidero in Utica, New York, Grabosky’s father was Stephen Custidero, who was part of the team that developed radar technology for the U.S. government during World War II. Her father died from accidental radiation exposure in 1945, and her mother later married Frank Carleo, who adopted Grabosky.
Grabosky graduated from Liverpool High School outside Syracuse, New York, as class valedictorian, Desmond said, and received a bachelor’s degree in philosophy from Syracuse University in 1962.
She was married to Hugh Grabosky when she moved to Joliet in 1968. She worked for a time for a charitable organization that helped teach children how to read and write, went back to school and received a master’s degree in English in 1972.
“She loved learning and reading and studying about a wide variety of topics,” Desmond said. “Her breadth and depth were outstanding, and she always had wanted to be a scholar.”
A University of Chicago professor encouraged her to consider a career in education, and she began student-teaching at Lincoln-Way Central High School.
“She liked the independence of teaching students, of designing curriculums, of making decisions about how to best teach kids, and she realized she could combine her lifelong love of learning with another aspect of her personality, which was about giving and wanting to make people better and society better,” Desmond said.
Grabosky taught English at Lincoln-Way Central from 1972 until 1995 and was department chair for the final 20 years of her time at the school.
“We shared a love of English literature and agreed that understanding the history of a culture was essential in understanding what students wrote,” said Susan Colin, who taught English at Lincoln-Way Central and also carpooled with Grabosky for many years. “This led to her creation of an advanced placement history and English class that was innovative and highly successful.”
Grabosky, by then divorced, met Desmond in the mid-1980s while taking classes together at the University of Iowa. They became a couple and lived in Flossmoor for many years before moving to Old Town in 1995. They married in 2014.
She spent her retirement years championing women’s rights and advocacy groups such as Planned Parenthood, Personal PAC and Emily’s List, as well as hosting fundraisers for female political candidates and female judge candidates.
“As she grew older and saw some of what was happening with women’s rights and some of the issues of the day, she became really concerned about women just continuing on with being able to have freedom of expression and freedom of choice to do whatever they wanted to do,” Desmond said.
In addition to Desmond, Grabosky is survived by two brothers, Frank and David Carleo.
A celebration of life service will take place at 3:30 p.m. May 15 at the Chicago History Museum.