TEENS SHARE PAIN, SUPPORT
Richards students participate in Challenge Day
Raise your hand if: You’ve been affected by divorce.
You’ve been treated differently because of your race, gender or religion.
You’ve ever been picked on, gossiped about, belittled or judged.
OK, now that all of us have our hands in the air, let’s consider how these kinds of experiences might affect teens and the culture of a high school.
On Tuesday, 100 students and staff members at Harold L. Richards High School in Oak Lawn addressed their pain by sharing it and learning about the struggles of others before vowing to help make their school a kinder, more accepting and less judgmental place.
Challenge Day, a six-and-ahalf hour social and emotional learning workshop for young people, aims to change the culture of a school by helping students see each other through an honest and open lens, said Chris Heinze, senior Challenge Day leader.
According to its website, the San Francisco Bay Area nonprofit, which has been featured on MTV’s “If You Really Knew Me” and the Oprah Show, has visited more than 2,200 schools over the past 30 years to “demonstrate the possibility of love and connection through the celebration of diversity, truth and full expression.”
Through ice breaker activities, including the emotional “cross the line” exercise, during which participants are asked to step forward if any of a number of social issues applies to them, individuals who might have begun the day as strangers ended it as friends.
“We talk about how everyone is suffering from terminal uniqueness — like we’re the only person going through the things we’re going through,” Heinze said. “But actually everyone has a story. We encourage people to
reach out, be a support and feel a little less alone.”
“The cornerstone of the program is to build empathy and compassion. As we do that we find school culture changes. Students feel a part of something,” he said.
Among the many students to stand up and address the crowd was Jaycee Aggelopoulos.
“This is not just a children thing, not just a teenager thing, not just a high school thing,” the junior said. “We're going to have issues and things that come up throughout our entire lives. I think that being able to learn how to cope with these things now, being able to cross the line together reminds us we are not alone.”
Administrative assistant Heather Bergman was among the adults chosen to participate. She said the experience was “amazing, absolutely amazing.
“I will not walk through the hallway like I did before. You never know what happened 10 minutes before you see somebody. You don't really know what's going on in these kids lives,” she said.
Teacher Adam Ziemba echoed that revelation.
“Cross the line was eye opening — to see kids going through these struggles at a young age,” he said. “Many have been through more than I have at 34.”
Vanessa Hightower, a junior from Oak Lawn, said, “I learned that a lot of people are going through different things and we should accept them for who they are and shouldn't judge them for what they're going through.”
Brittony Davis said she made new friends.
“I learned that it's OK to open yourself up and talk to people. I met new people. I talked to new people and it was OK,” said Davis, a junior from Oak Lawn. “Now I feel it's OK to listen to people. It's OK to be there for people. And it's OK to express your feelings about anything that might be happening to you.”
District 218 was awarded a $10,000 grant from AT&T to host the program, which will also take place at Alan B. Shepard and Dwight D. Eisenhower high schools.
After he was approached by the corporation, Sen. Bill Cunningham, D-18th District, suggested Richards apply for the grant.
“This school really reflects my district, which goes from 84th and Ashland in the city to 159th and Will Cook Road in Orland Park,” he said. “It's a big diverse district, with people from a lot of backgrounds.”
Cunningham said he experienced a similar kind of bonding exercise when he was a student at Mount Carmel High School in the 1980s.
“It really broke down the tough guy mentality that was really prominent at Mount Carmel back then. It drew us closer together,” he said.
“We're in a completely different era now. Social media has changed what it's like to be a kid. There's so much more pressure and a lot more conflict because it allows for anonymous attacks,” he said. “Now you have things broadcasted literally all over the world and it gives bullies a new opportunity to pick on people.
“That makes programs like this so much more valuable,” he said.
Heinze said not only does the program build resilience and empathy in the kids and adults who participate, it then sends them back into the school of 1,500 as ambassadors of compassion and kindness.
As the daylong event winded down, Heinze asked, “Who knows what it's like to leave home and be kind of glad that you left?”
Nearly half of the hands in the room went up.
“Today we get to create on this campus a different place. That's my invitation — what are we going to do to make this place feel like a place we all belong to regardless of where we come from?” he said.
From this day forward, he said, Richards will become a place where “all will belong, feel secure and be inspired.”