Dayton Daily News

How do you share news of a miscarriag­e with family, friends and co-workers?

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From Anne Grady, speaker and author of “Strong Enough: Choosing Courage, Resilience, and Triumph”:

Acknowledg­e the awkwardnes­s of the situation.

If you want to talk about it, let friends or family know. If you want to be left alone, it is OK to ask for that as well.

Share the informatio­n on your timetable, and tell those closest to you in person.

Over the phone is the next best thing. Don’t beat around the bush or prolong it more than you have to. Say something along the lines of, “While there is no easy way to say this, I need to tell you something. We lost the baby.” Then, be silent, and give the person a moment to process. Let him or her know that there is no right or wrong reaction, and explain the best way to support you.

Can a friend do a couple of loads of laundry or make dinner? The more specific the better.

At work, share the news with your manager as soon as you feel comfortabl­e. This will help alleviate some of the pressure at work. For coworkers, try to tell everyone at once. While difficult, it will stop the spread of rumors and innuendo.

From Dr. Robin Elise Weiss, Lamaze childbirth educator, doula and parenting author

Tell people about your miscarriag­e as soon as you can and in whatever way is easiest for you. While some may say that this isn’t the sort of thing you email, that’s not true — particular­ly, if you only told a few people of your pregnancy.

A quick: “We were so excited to be welcoming our baby, but it wasn’t meant to be this time.”

You can add exact details of what you want their response to be, as well. Examples might be: “We need some time and space” and “We’d love some meals.”

If you used social media to announce your pregnancy, this might also be the place to tastefully announce your loss as well. Similar to the wording above, you can make a quick tweet or Facebook post.

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