They’re the Bengals,
We had tickets to the Dragons game Friday night but steered clear of downtown when the weather radar looked like an exploded Crayola box. I know you have that cool sellout streak, Dragons, but I will be trading in my tickets for seats to an upcoming game. I’ll wear the Heater suit, but I’m getting in! so you just knew they’d pick Joe Mixon in the NFL draft. It couldn’t happen any other way. Dangling Mixon and the rest of the eligible players in front of forgiving owner Mike Brown was like putting a glazed donut and kale salad in front of a fat guy. Which one do you think he’s going to devour?
Brown went for the donut, and he’s probably doubling down on his sociology experiment by lining up Pacman Jones to be Mixon’s mentor. Somebody needs to show him the town. Mixon, who knocked out a female student at Oklahoma in 2014 certainly deserves a second chance. He sounds remorseful, and I hope things work out. But do the Bengals need this distraction? The questions will keep coming and Marvin Lewis will need a few crates of Just for Men hair color goop.
I liked the Browns’ move
of trading down from No. 12 in the first round when the guy they
KNUCKLEHEAD OF THE WEEK
You’ve probably never heard of Ryan Pace, but Chicago Bears fans know him, and they’ll probably be egging his house for months. Pace is the Bears’ general manager, the guy who orchestrated an awful trade on Day 1 of the NFL draft. The Bears were fleeced by the 49ers, who pilfered four draft picks to allow Chicago to move up one spot in the first round, from No. 3 to No. 2. Chicago took quarterback Mitchell Trubisky, who started 13 games in his college career. He likely won’t play this season because the Bears signed Mike Glennon to a $45 million contract. As a Vikings fan, I say give Mr. Pace a raise! wanted — Mitchell Trubisky — was gone. Guess we found out what they think of Deshaun Watson, huh? Cleveland ended up picking Notre Dame QB DeShone Kizer in Round 2. Kizer has plenty of that ND arrogance, telling USA Today he has “the ability to be the greatest quarterback to ever play.” Or he’ll be the next Jason Campbell.
Former Michigan tight end
Jake Butt landed an all-time classic endorsement deal with Charmin. You know, the toilet paper. Good to know pro athletes have a sense of humor. He’s also a smart kid. Butt tore an ACL in the Orange Bowl, which hurt his draft stock. But he took out an insurance policy and made more than $500,000 because he wasn’t picked in the first three rounds of the draft. Sounds like gambling to me.
Larry Bird is stepping down
as president of the Indiana Pacers. That’s a good move for Bird, who always looks like someone stole his dog when his mug is shown during games. He had some good teams in Indy, but the Pacers were not able to take the next step. It must be terribly frustrating for one of the NBA’s all-time greats to watch his team struggle just to get into the playoffs.
Trending up:
Philadelphia, Kendall Graveman, Gift Ngoepe. What a great setting for the NFL draft in the City of Brotherly Love. From the USA! chants to the raucous booing whenever Roger Goodell stepped on stage, the scene in Philly was a high-energy boost