Interracial couples share their stories at UA
Event coincides with Rethinking Race series.
University of Akron President Matthew Wilson recalls walking into a restaurant in Iowa with his wife, Noriko, from Japan, years ago.
“As we walked in, I felt like we had walked in from Mars,” Wilson said, noting that the patrons were all white. “People were staring at us, whispering.”
Noriko Wilson remembered that when some people in Japan learned she was marrying Matthew, a white American, they were incredulous, saying “What are you doing? You’re going to kind of abandon your own country, your own culture.”
The Wilsons talked about their marriage — the early days and why it has endured for 27 years — last week, joining two other couples for a panel discussion on interracial couples at the University of Akron.
UA student Abi Uwadiae, 20, an accounting major from Columbus, said she organized the event as part of her duties as diversity chair of the Zips Programming Network for undergraduate students.
She also wanted to put on a program that dovetailed with the UA’s Rethinking Race series of discussions this month.
“I wanted to do something different,” she said, to get people “thinking outside the box.”
Joining the Wilsons on the panel were Shanika Cochran, an African-American who leads the women’s ministry at Akron-Canton Church of Christ in Akron, and her white husband, Robert Cochran, who is the lead evangelist at the church. They live in Canton. David Matheny, a white University of Akron graduate, and his Puerto Rican partner, Carlos DeJesus, who is studying nursing and psychology at Stark State College, were the third couple on the panel. They live in North Canton. Gauging reactions Asked about reactions from family and others to their relationship, Shanika Cochran said, “I didn’t really know I was black until I was in fourth grade.”
She explained that race wasn’t a topic of conversation in her home while she was growing up, and her parents “didn’t really care” about Robert being white.
Robert Cochran revealed that his father “never deterred” him from dating a black woman. But then Shanika and Robert became engaged, and Robert’s father threatened not to come to the wedding.
He did come, after Robert convinced him that “once you get to know her, all this (apprehension about an interracial marriage) will go away.”
Now, “Dad totally loves her and embraces her,” he said.
Matheny said that he and DeJesus “get the normal stares and gawking” — not because they are different races, but because they are gay.
Matthew Wilson said “my family, I think was in shock” — not because he was marrying an Asian woman, but rather because of the couple’s brief courtship, and his and Noriko’s age difference. She is six years older.
The two, both attending the University of Utah, met in July 1990 and were married Christmas Day of the same year.
Noriko Wilson said race didn’t play into her family’s feelings about the two getting married.
“They didn’t know anything about Matt ... it was more they were worried what I was getting into ... (but) Matt was able to speak in Japanese.”
And Matthew Wilson said he promised Noriko’s father that the couple would visit Japan at least once a year. Wilson, noting the couple spent years living in Japan, said he has kept his promise.
Matthew Wilson had served a volunteer service mission — coordinated by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints — in northern Japan before he met Noriko. After the couple married, he went on to live in Japan for several years and then later, after receiving his law degree, worked at Temple University’s campus in Japan from 2003 to 2009.
Today, the Wilsons have four children and three grandchildren.
Finding strength Panelists, speaking at the Jean Hower Taber Student Union on the UA campus, talked about how their relationships get strength from their partner’s character.
“I feel in love with my wife’s character and who she is,” Robert said. A partner’s “character and values make you better.”
DeJesus said he and Matheny “have this charisma. It’s nothing about race. It’s literally just an attraction between two people and who they are.”
Noriko Wilson said: “You have to respect that person you love . ... You need to be honest to the person. ... Sometimes we hide who we are.”
The Wilsons, who also spoke during an interview before the panel, said they wanted to break down stereotypes.
“Let’s work not to characterize,” Wilson said, “not to criticize, not to categorize.”
UA student Dana Madaris, 18, who is African-American, and her boyfriend, Jared Weingart, 18, who is white, were among those attending the panel discussion.
“I thought it would be good to hear people’s stories,” Madaris said.