Uncivil discourse abounds in today’s game

Cy the Cynic once had a job. He has money, and we know it didn’t come from an inheritance or from winning the lottery. But Cy won’t talk about his former occupation.

“Cy, were you employed by an aluminum company?”

“For a while. I got canned.”

“Did you work for a bicycle manufacturer?” “Yes, as a spokesperson.” “Did you teach the art of origami, Cy?”

“I tried, but my business folded.”

Cy was declarer at today’s 3NT. West led a heart, and Cy won with dummy’s king and led a diamond to his queen. West took the ace and led another heart to Cy’s ace.

The Cynic then led a club to dummy and returned the jack of spades for a finesse. West produced the king, and Cy’s contract folded: West took three hearts for down one.

“You could make it,” North asserted.

Cy denies that he was a civil engineer and he certainly wasn’t civil to North. Cy announced that North had lost his mind.

Could South make 3NT? Yes, though it’s not certain that he should or would. Cy could succeed by guessing to win the first heart in his hand and leading a diamond, but say he first cashes four clubs. West can’t afford to discard a diamond. He can let go one spade but has no good second discard. If West pitches a second spade, Cy can discern the position and drop the king instead of finessing.

If West throws a heart, Cy can afford to start the diamonds. He may lose two tricks in that suit but only two hearts, and he will have nine winners: four clubs, two diamonds, two hearts and a spade.