‘Torture’ for a 10-year-old? No internet

Youth use social media as a way to explore feelings, understand different perspectives, receive emotional support, and feel valued and loved.

Youth use social media as a way to explore feelings, understand different perspectives, receive emotional support, and feel valued and loved. When this lifeline is restricted, kids tell me they feel depressed and isolated. It’s a horrible type of psychological quarantine, made worse by parents who ridicule their technological existence.

I realize this sounds very ominous and foreign to many parents. Don’t waste time lamenting this new world. The challenge is to help our kids figure out how to control this technology in a balanced and positive manner.

I’ve been talking to a lot of parents about what’s working in their families, and here are some of their ideas.

1. Don’t prohibit technology. It’s tempting to simply declare that your child will never have a cell phone, which is like saying that your teen will never drive because of the risks of accidents. As with most things, a moderate approach seems to work best.

2. Monitor its use. Kids don’t have the self-control to have unrestricted use of cell phones and iPads. Establish simple rules and monitor the use of social media, texting, Snapchat, and other technology platforms. Don’t be deceitful. Inform your child of the rules, and be certain to adjust expectations as your child demonstrates responsible behavior.

3. Establish some stringent family rules that apply to everyone, including parents. These might include never using a cell phone at family meals, after 9 p.m., or looking at a cell phone whenever you are talking with someone else. Some of these suggestions (e.g., not looking at your cell phone during conversations) clash dramatically with our culture.

I wonder if that 10-yearold might change her perspective when she gets older. The myth of school violence

Dr. Ramey is the executive director of Dayton Children's Hospital's Pediatric Center for Mental Health Resources and can be contacted at Rameyg@childrensdayton. org.

With the holidays coming soon, you may be holding family gatherings and getting out the good silverware for those parties. Use these hints when washing to keep the silverware in good condition.

Clean sterling silverware by hand in hot, soapy water. Rinse well and dry thoroughly with a soft cloth. You also can put it into the dishwasher, but if the sterling silver is old or valuable, be cautious because the detergent could discolor it with long-term use. Never put hollow-handled pieces into the dishwasher. If you have silver-plate, you can put it into the dishwasher as well, but remove before the drying cycle and dry with a soft towel.

Never place silverware pieces next to stainless-steel flatware in the same basket in the dishwasher. Over time, this can remove the silver. — Heloise

Saving money on gift wrapping

Dear Heloise: With the upcoming holiday events, I will have to wrap a large number of presents for my

Just look around your home. Rip out the sheets from unused coloring books or school artwork to wrap gifts for relatives. Save the color comics pages from the newspaper for children’s presents. Repurpose a scarf that you are no longer using for a girlfriend’s gift. Wrap packages with large pretty scraps of leftover fabric. Always save and reuse ribbon and gift bows. — Heloise

Yucky toys

Dear readers: Children love to play with toys in the bathtub and elsewhere in the house. But they become slimy and dirty after a while. Here’s how to clean them:

Put the toys into a gallon-size container. Fill with water and two cups of vinegar. Soak for a few minutes. Then wipe off with a sponge and rinse in clean water. Dry completely. — Heloise

Preventing candle fires

Dear readers: Candles create such a lovely glow and add light to any room in your house. But they can be dangerous if left unattended. Take these steps to make sure that does not happen.

■ Never leave a room with candles burning in it. Extinguish them all.