When holidays are stuffed with conflict

And to think things were going so well.

So much to be grateful for. This was going to be the perfect story to share as we round the corner in this season of Thanksgiving.

For what better to be thankful for than finding love?

Which is what my best friend appears to have done.

The college boyfriend she was married to more than 30 years, the one who left her for his secretary, the one who never treated her very nicely anyway.

Yeah, that one.

He is long gone.

First thing to be thankful for. Then there is this: Friend found a great guy.

He adores her, treats her like a queen.

They have such fun, share common values.

Or they seemed to.

Until they started talking about the holidays.

For the first time, superstar Beau will spend Thanksgiving with Friend and her family.

This, of course, led to a natural conversation about what do you serve?

A landmine field if ever there was one.

Honestly, it’s amazing any relationship gets past combining holiday traditions.

This fairytale love story came to a crashing halt right after turkey.

“And we’ll have the casserole dish of stuffing on the side,” Friend said going down the list.

“Oh, no, no, Darling,” Beau interjected, lovingly putting his hand over hers. “The stuffing goes inside the bird.”

Which is how this love affair collided with one of the biggest conflicts in the history of America. Stuffing vs. Dressing.

There is no bigger divide. Trust me, Dear Reader, I know you have your opinion.

Beau sees it as juices from the turkey seeping into the stuffing as it cooks, making it moist and giving it actual flavor.

Just the mention of this puts Friend’s gag reflex into overdrive, sure as she is that the stuffing will never cook through. She can instantly imagine the salmonella swishing around in her mouth.

Which is where she was when she called me in distress. “Is it possible he’s ‘The One’ for only 364 days of the year? Will Thanksgiving drive us apart?” she worried.

I understand the distress. We make holiday plans. The Thanksgiving gods laugh. For decades, I dreamed of having my own family, of making all the Thanksgiving dishes I grew up on. My family hates every single one of those dishes I dreamed of. Those beloved flavors now live on only in my memory.

Thank goodness I found it easier to solve someone else’s holiday dilemma.

“The answer is abundance,” I announced. “Why choose?

Make twice the stuffing. Half goes inside the turkey. The rest goes in a casserole dish. You each get what you want.”

I could hear Friend exhale and smile.

“Brilliant,” she said, as we each went back to writing our lists. Hers, for shopping.

Mine for gratitude.

Thankful that the holiday gods stuffed me with wisdom to save this love story.

Now, I just pray Beau believes macaroni and cheese counts as a vegetable.