East Bay Times

Friend wants to start relationsh­ip counseling

- Horoscope » By Eugenia Last Harriette Cole is a lifestylis­t and founder of DREAMLEAPE­RS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriet­te@ harriettec­ole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndicatio­n, 1130 Walnu

DEAR HARRIETTE »

A childhood friend suggested seeking platonic relationsh­ip counseling for our 15-year friendship that's facing challenges due to differing opinions and life phases. We were very close when we were growing up and as life has happened, we seem to be drifting apart. I would love to stay friends with him, but I'm unsure if this is too extreme for a nonromanti­c relationsh­ip. How can I assess whether therapy is appropriat­e and beneficial for our situation?

— Friend Counseling

DEAR FRIEND COUNSELING » I absolutely LOVE this idea. Why does therapy have to be for couples or families only? In many instances, the people we are closest to are friends, and over time, many friendship­s face roadblocks. The fact that your friend values your relationsh­ip enough to admit that

Happy Birthday: Tidy up and get ready to move forward with enthusiasm. Don't hesitate when you see something you want. Your numbers are 6, 10, 22, 26, 34, 41, 47.

Birthday Baby: You are compassion­ate, resourcefu­l and wise. You are persuasive and ambitious.

Aries (March 21-April 19): Don't be too eager to offer your services before you understand the situation. Look inward and concentrat­e on personal growth instead of trying to change others. \*\*\*

Taurus (April 20-May 20): Turn your back on what you don't condone and focus on what makes you hopeful. Your insight and wisdom will impact others and change the outcome. \*\*\*\*\* things are uncomforta­ble now and you could use help figuring your way through it is outstandin­g.

Do some research to find a therapist who has experience in counseling platonic friends. Then go to this therapist with an open heart and willingnes­s to go through the process. What commonly happens in therapy is that people begin to discuss things about themselves from their past that impact them today. What you discover will likely be useful for this friendship and beyond.

DEAR HARRIETTE » I'm 19 years old and I still live at home with my mom. Being the youngest in my family, my close relationsh­ip with my mom has led to resentment from my older siblings, who are 23 and 27. Now that I'm the only one at home, the strain has increased. They accuse

Gemini (May 21-June 20):

Adopt wisdom, experience and better decisions. Don't let someone lead you in a direction that fulfills them and not you. Concentrat­e on doing something physical. \*\*

Cancer (June 21-July 22):

Explore what life has to offer. Contact friends who enrich your life and start conversati­ons that fuel your imaginatio­n. \*\*\*\*

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22):

Don't let anyone take advantage of you or let your ego trick you into thinking someone's compliment­s are to benefit you. \*\*\*

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):

An unusual connection will offer insight into new possibilit­ies and people and places that can help you fill your imaginatio­n with tangible solutions. \*\*\* me of monopolizi­ng her time or getting her to take my side on things. I think that's ridiculous. Of course I talk to her more. We live in the same house. How can I maintain a strong connection with my mom while addressing the growing tension with my siblings? I value all of these relationsh­ips and want to find a balance. — Jealousy

DEAR JEALOUSY » Live your life. The bond you and your mother have is precious and should be treated as such. You are at home. Be fully present. Continue to talk to your mom and support her as she supports you. Soak up all the knowledge you can while you are living with her. What you can do less of is talk about these moments with your siblings. Your relationsh­ip with your mom is uniquely yours.

Your siblings are young adults now. At their ages, they are

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):

Don't follow someone else's playbook. Formulate what you want and make it happen. Pick up the slack and put some muscle behind your words. You have plenty to gain if you stay focused, keep it simple and stick to a budget. \*\*\*

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

Rethink how to use your space gainfully. A change at home will influence how those close to you feel and what they choose to do next. \*\*\*\*

Sagittariu­s (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Take a walk down memory lane and revisit what you'd do differentl­y. Consider what brings you joy and whether it's time to mix things up and try something new. \*\*

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Address issues affecting building their own independen­t lives, even as they are still clinging to your mom. Their dynamics are naturally changing. Sadly, you are caught in the middle. Do your best to stay out of their drama. Encourage them to spend time with your mom and to call her on a regular basis to check in. You can also suggest times when the three of you can hang out. Ask them to include you in some of their social activities so that you get out of the house and enjoy each other's company as siblings. your home or finances before someone pressures you. Take an intelligen­t approach that encourages organizing and executing an unexpected plan. \*\*\*\*\*

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Keep your thoughts to yourself until you have a plan and enough knowledge to ward off any interferen­ce you encounter. Play down any situation that is causing contempt. Take care of your promises and responsibi­lities. \*\*\*

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20): Embrace change and discard whatever's holding you back. Set yourself free from negativity and head in a direction that offers a direct link to someone or something you want to pursue. Focus on who and what bring you joy. \*\*\*

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